Say what you will about Mariah Carey but her brand is STRONG. When they cut back to Mariah on the E! Red Carpet show and she was standing at the top of a flight of stairs beside Ryan Seacrest, my first thought was how did she get up those stairs? Sorry – I should say she was strategically perched on a platform, in the best light at the perfect angle. As soon as the interview was over, Ryan scurried over to help her down the stairs. I swear I saw at least three other people run over to help. 

Mariah doesn’t walk. She has made that very clear. Brand. Strong. I haven’t found the clip of this specific moment yet but apparently when Mariah was interviewed by Al Roker, she made him switch sides with her so she could be on her good side, naturally. The entire Al Roker interview (with SHARON STONE!) is Peak Mariah so please enjoy below. 

 

The songwriter jab is everything. If you’ve been following Mimi’s career, you know that songwriting is something Mariah has felt like she doesn’t get enough credit for. That and the burden of carrying Dembabies in her womb. Mariah is not wrong that women don’t get taken as seriously as songwriters and it’s an issue in music that needs to be addressed but she’s basically checking herself out in the camera the whole interview and she follows it up with asking Sharon Stone to trade diamonds with her so her point about gender parity gets a little lost in the mix. 

The most on brand Mariah Carey moment of the night was America Ferrara’s attempt to pull Mariah in for a photo with Emma Stone, Natalie Portman and Billie Jean King. I am convinced that Mariah has no idea who any of these people are. She doesn’t know them. There is an uncomfortable hesitation before Mariah relents and joins the group for a photo. Lainey read the situation like this: 

 Likely. But I think she was trying to figure out who these ladies were who were before she committed. I want a 30 for 30 on this moment. 

I’ll leave you with a photo of Mariah looking very young and thin beside Nick Jonas at an after party because that’s how she would want it.