Prince Harry and Jon Bon Jovi were together today as they’ve partnered in support of the Invictus Games. Jon’s recording a song for the games. Speaking of songs though, when we were killing time on set the other day at etalk, we started belting out "Livin’ On A Prayer", undeniably an all-time great song. What makes an all-time great song? You will know that song anywhere you are, whenever you are. It comes on and you’re in, like immediately. Every musician dreams of writing a song like that, and they’re lying if they say they don’t. A few of the lyrics of "Livin’ On A Prayer", hilariously, kind of apply to the Sussexes right now.
“Meghan dreams of running away
When she cries in the night, Harry whispers
Baby, it's okay, someday”
Halfway there now. Actually, more than halfway. Almost there. And the way I imagine them, they’re cheesy enough to sing this to each other:
“We've got to hold on to what we've got
It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not
We've got each other and that's a lot for love
We'll give it a shot”
The prayer that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are livin’ for is happy independence from the British royal family. This, of course, has been a polarising decision. Anecdotally, if my inbox and mentions are any indication, half of you think this is a case of two spoiled brats having a suck attack. The others sympathise with how the Sussexes, Meghan in particular as a biracial woman, have been treated by the British media but also by members of Harry’s family and their aides.
Michelle Ruiz wrote a piece for Vanity Fair the other day addressing the fact that the British monarchy, always tasked with staying relevant, will be losing two of its shiniest stars. And she brings up a question that should be getting a lot more play – and complemented it with a great joke:
“But the brevity of Harry and Meghan’s time as senior royals begs the question: How inhospitable must the royal mantle be to a biracial self-identified feminist and her rebel-hearted husband that they said goodbye so soon? The Irishman felt longer than Harry and Meg’s tenure.”
Ha! The Irishman! I’m still angry about The Irishman and its length. Also the terrible tech. That scene where Robert De Niro is supposed to be kicking a shopkeeper was pathetic.
But back to Harry and Meghan – seriously though, imagine how bad it must be behind the scenes in the British royal family for her to want to peace out and for him to leave it behind? Think about that. Even if you’re not a fan of Meghan Markle, and I know you’re out there, for all the assumptions out there about her motivations and whether or not she’s a manipulative bitch…
OK, let’s say she is. Let’s say she’s schemed her way into the British royal family – one of the more common narratives – well then how do you explain that she’s getting the f-ck out of there?! It’s like that scene in A Few Good Men when Tom Cruise is cross-examining Jack Nicholson in the court room and catches him in the contradiction:
“If you ordered that Santiago wasn't to be touched…and your orders are always followed…then why was Santiago in danger? Why would it be necessary to transfer him off the base? Why the two orders? Your men obey orders.”
If she conned her way into the family, pulled a fast one to infiltrate the fortress, and would do anything to be a princess, then why did she find her way out of the castle?
God that scene. Audiences today I think are too cynical to enjoy that scene now for the pure unapologetic cinematic extra it served. But it will never not be satisfying to me.
As for the Sussexes, big week next week as they return to London and join the Queen and the other senior royals for official engagements. Let’s see who puts on the best and worst fake smile.
Here is Prince Harry at Abbey Road studios with Jon Bon Jovi.
