The identity of the Woman in the Club with Michael Bae Jordan was only one of last week’s big mysteries (thank you all for your thorough detective work, the case is ongoing). The other is what Rihanna and Handsome Hassan were arguing about on their Mexican vacation. 
The photos of Rihanna and Hassan made it look like they were in a very heated disagreement. The photos became a meme but they also sparked rumours of trouble in paradise, pun intended. My stance was that this was a classic case of Photo Assumption, that we would maybe never know what Rihanna and Handsome Hassan were really fighting over, or if they were seriously fighting at all. I also theorized that maybe Rihanna, like me, is just a very heated debater. I get fired up in conversations about the silliest sh-t, especially sports. My dude and I have almost broken up several times over his incorrect devotion to Tom Brady and the Patriots. 

I don’t want to be that asshole who brags about being right but I’m pretty sure I was right. Rihanna posted this to Instagram last week: 


A post shared by badgalriri (@badgalriri) on

Are you dead? God, I love her so much. Rihanna is implying that she and Handsome Hassan were exchanging words over the biggest sports tournament in the world. Who WASN’T fighting about the World Cup? Households were divided. Offices were at war. This is the PERFECT reaction, even if she’s just trolling us. Rihanna and Hassan may have been having a serious argument but maybe they’re good now. The best way to play it off would be to suggest the fight wasn’t a big deal and go viral while doing so – so viral that it overshadows the photos everyone was talking about initially. It’s a classic redirect. Rihanna has excellent PR game.
IF Rihanna and Hassan were just sparring over the World Cup, I stand by my assertion that she is always right. This brilliant post just proves my point. Rihanna is undefeated, which means she was rooting for France, right? ALLEZ LES BLEUS (I don’t know a lot about soccer but Team France won me over early.)

Now the only mystery is whether Rihanna and Hassan are comforting each other during World Cup Withdrawal. I would like to Photo Assumption the sh-t out of those pics, please.