Miss Branjie, Miss Branjie, Miss…Branjie

Prem Posted by Prem at March 27, 2019 20:33:09 March 27, 2019 20:33:09

Miss Branjie. That’s what I’m naming the surprising, yet titillating romance between Brooke Lynn Hytes and Miss Vanessa Vanjie Mateo. Honourable mention for a ship name goes to Branessa Lynnjie Hyteo. So far, Drag Race Season 11 has been the gift that keeps on giving, and last Thursday’s Untucked was no different. What’s amazing to me is that in the history of RuPaul’s Drag Race, we’ve never had an on-screen romance, which is surprising because that is such an excellent environment for sexual chemistry and the ensuing gossip and drama. Also confining a bunch of attractive men in the same space for three weeks is bound to have started something at some point no? Of the relationships that we do know, Sahara and Manila were on different seasons, as were Sharon and Alaska. The closest we’ve come to a same season chemistry was Jinkx and Ivy on Season 5, although that was cut short pretty quickly by Ivy’s elimination.

Brooke Lynn and Vanjie know how big of a deal this is, which is why they’ve been milking it (no pun intended) on every social media platform possible.  

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A post shared by VANESSA VANJIE MATEO (@vanessavanjie) on

 

 

 

It’s such a big deal that it even has Chips Ahoy’s attention. When a soulless corporate entity takes interest in Drag Race, you know that it’s important. 

I’m 100% sure that Miss Branjie is playing this up for the attention and the PR, but I don’t think the whole relationship was manufactured for drama. I don’t know about Brooke Lynn, but that doesn’t seem like Miss Vanjie’s style. Although this is unconfirmed, there are rumours that the two dated after filming, but broke up right before the new season aired. For now, their bond seems authentic and real, and the Branjie romance is a storyline that elevates intrigue in the show, so I’m all for it. Relationship gossip aside, what I’m really curious about is the logistics of it, and I have several questions:

1.    Can you f-ck on RuPaul’s Drag Race? There are strict rules for the girls, and I imagine no f-cking would be one of them. But also, maybe it’s like the Olympic Village, known for the boatloads of condoms for the amount of sex that happens between athletes. RPDR is like the Olympics of Drag. Maybe you can f-ck if it makes for good TV – I wouldn’t put that past RuPaul’s producers. 
2.    Does dating someone on the show affect the competition? Do you help your boo with the challenges? What happens when you have to lip sync against them? I think we’re pretty much guaranteed an emotional Branjie lip sync from the producers, and both seem like they’re in for the long haul so this will be high stakes high drama for sure. 
3.    Are you obligated to pick your boyfriend first in team challenges? If I’m team captain, I’m picking Yvie Oddly before anyone else, I don’t care who I’m dating. 
4.    How do you deal with jealousy, especially if someone gets knocked out early? Even more so if one of you wins? That’s gotta be something you can rub in someone’s face when you’re fighting. 

PS I don’t usually comment on the intimate details of people’s sex lives, the last question was basically asked by Brooke Lynn Hytes herself:

 

Through the magic that is Tiffany “New York” Pollard, we learned in Untucked, among other things, that Brooke Lynn waxes her asshole. That ain’t something a top does, girl… and I’ll leave it at that.

In this week’s episode, it looks like Miss Branjie will have some competition.  

Of course, Silky would cash in on the romance card for more screen time, but I want to know more about #Silkina. Maybe this will be the horniest season on RuPaul’s Drag Race. We’ll just have to wait and see. 
 

Photos:
Jim Spellman/ Getty Images

Tags: Hook Ups , TV Smut
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