One of my favourite Oscars behind-the-scenes stories is from 2013 when Anne Hathaway changed her dress last minute because she found out Amanda Seyfried was wearing something similar. The dress Anne Hathaway changed into was a pale pink Prada situation that, as Duana aptly noted at the time, “is not the dress to win your first Oscar in.” I don’t think it’s the dress you want to do anything in.
First of all, this dress stresses me out. It looks it would crease at a slight breeze. You can’t sit down in a dress like this without sit lines showing up in the exact parts your body moved in order for you to sit. Plus, the nipples. The nipples on this dress are too much. It’s the first thing my eyes are drawn to. It is not a flattering dress. This was at the height of #Hathahate which I still think was unfair but the hate for this dress is warranted. Anything that makes you look back fondly on Gwyneth Paltrow’s Ralph Lauren from the 1999 Oscars is not your best look. If people are saying that your dress is a worse version of THIS, you went wrong.
Which brings me to Saoirse Ronan in Calvin Klein this year. Saoirse has been KILLING it this season. I’ve loved all of her looks leading up to last night. I don’t understand why she showed up in a Gwyneth/Anne hand-me-down. The good thing is that her dress is slightly above both Anne’s and Gwyneth’s. The colour is great on her. I love her blunt bob. I love the matching soft blush makeup but I don’t love this dress. I really dislike the bow in the back. The fabric is bunching at the nipples, like Anne Hathaway all over again. The train is wrinkly. Once again, how does she sit in this? Vogue is calling this look “already iconic” so maybe we’re fighting but I was hoping for more from Saoirse. Sigh.
The one tidbit from that Vogue article I loved is that Saoirse’s pink bow comes off, which probably explains why she didn’t change for the Vanity Fair party. I do love a versatile day to night outfit. Plus, Saoirse may have gone with this look since she knew she’d be losing to Frances McDormand. To call back Duana’s quote, “this is not the dress you win your first Oscar in.” Saoirse knew this wasn’t her time. So, why not wear a Pepto-Bismol bottle to the Oscars?
I’m going to end on a nice moment involving Saoirse because now I feel bad for comparing Saoirse’s dress to diarrhea relief medication. Vanity Fair pointed out that the losing Best Actress nominees were caught in an embrace after they all lost. I can almost get down with this dress when it’s covered by 3 other people.