Assy Style Stop showing me your thighs I am a fickle bitch. Ordinarily this is not a particularly positive attribute but it can be quite useful when it comes to objects of fantasy. The whole point of a Freebie 5 is what happens with the unattainable quiver. They can’t unattainable quiver if they suck sh-t. Laura, By Lainey • Jan 04, 2010 09:06 am
Assy Style No playoffs for the famous Marc Anthony bought into the Miami Dolphins this season. He and his wife have made it a home game tradition to roll out some kind of carpet, and Fergie, also a co-owner, showed up yesterday with Josh Duhamel to round out the season…which was a losing one. So many By Lainey • Jan 04, 2010 05:30 am
Assy Style Best of 2009: Porny at the Chili Cook-off! Please. You know it was coming. There’s a special place in my heart for Jessica Simpson. She isn’t evil inside like Ebola Hilton. Porny’s issues stem from her father’s f-ckery, and the lack of true friendship and brain mass. But she’s not ill intentioned. There By Lainey • Dec 31, 2009 09:51 am
Quiveration Worst of 2009: Ed Westwick at Teen Choice You’ve blocked it out, haven’t you? My Shamef-ck showed up at Teen Choice in August shamef-cking me to hell in his rolled up jeans and no socks and loafers, puckering his lips and posing like a cross dressing private school punk ballerina stuck inside a music box, what? By Lainey • Dec 30, 2009 03:23 am
Assy Style JLo’s losing season Ugh. My Dolphins pissed away the season. They lost yesterday to the Texans and can “technically” still make the playoffs but only IF they win next week and FOUR OTHER TEAMS LOSE. Please. It’s a waste of a season. And it’s Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez’s inaugural By Lainey • Dec 28, 2009 02:33 am
Assy Style Robo’s lumberjack heels Katie Holmes went shopping yesterday on her own … with bodyguards. Wonder what Little Sci is getting from Hermes. Along the way, she ran into a friend and remembered how to smile. Exhausted from all the money spending, Katie hit up the Starbucks for a coffee break. You will note, she’ By Lainey • Dec 24, 2009 02:40 am
Famewhores Are your breasts in this movie? Because the way she was hardposing and preening on the carpet last night in New York at the premiere of Sherlock Holmes, you’d think she was playing him herself. Lively Breasts needs to show some respect. Look at her. Look at her working that body. It’s a crazy By Lainey • Dec 18, 2009 02:33 am
Maple Leaf Red carpet in character The Sherlock Holmes premiere went down tonight in London. As you can see, our star RDJ’s red carpet outfit appeared to be Sherlock-inspired. Love it. He was, as always, accompanied by his wife Susan. How’s the movie? There was a screening at the junket this weekend. Reviews will By Lainey • Dec 14, 2009 10:35 am
Parent Pimps Garters in the winter Oh look, it’s Taylor Momsen walking around New York trying to give you a glimpse of her snatch. You like the garters? She thinks she’s so punk as f-ck, non? Taylor was heading to set on Gossip Girl. I was agonising with my friend LB this weekend about By Lainey • Dec 14, 2009 08:59 am
Assy Style Grounds for dismissal I get emails all the time about Henry Cavill arguing his case on the Freebie 5. Based on his hotness in The Tudors? Worthy of consideration, sure. But the way he looked at the Grand Prix Horse Show this weekend? It’s grounds for dismissal. It’s a major, major By Lainey • Dec 14, 2009 05:21 am
Assy Style Chicken Fried real hair? Britney Spears went shopping yesterday looking a goddamn mess. Is this the real hair? If so, the real hair isn’t much of an improvement on the fake hair. After years of abuse and over treatment, not to mention all the medication, that sh-t just grows out busted all by By Lainey • Dec 10, 2009 02:02 am
Hollywood Closet Don’t tell him what to do on his bike He’s a big boy on his big bike and he knows better than you. So if you dare question Tom’s manly man knowledge, you’re going to get The Hand. Please. Why try? He knows EVERYTHING. He has studied the History of Bikes. You don’t know the By Lainey • Dec 09, 2009 02:12 am
Royals When Miley met the Queen At the Royal Variety performance last night, Miley Cyrus was one of several high profile entertainers who lined up to greet the Queen. So far there’s been only one picture that I can find of Miley’s moment with Her Majesty but it is enough for us to Photo By Lainey • Dec 08, 2009 01:58 am
Baby and Bump Obsession Tom’s Spanish family weekend Little Sci loves dressing up in pretty frilly things. Just like Daddy? Little Sci’s advantage is that she gets to do this in public. She and Katie Holmes flew to Sevilla, Spain this weekend to spend time with Tom who’s been busy shooting Knight & Day with Cameron By Lainey • Dec 07, 2009 01:43 am
Assy Style Up in the Air Opens tomorrow. You must go see. Up in the Air has scored a 92% rating among Top Critics on Rotten Tomatoes, it’s considered a major contender during awards season, and this is George Clooney’s best performance. I screened it with a theatre full of journalists at TIFF. They By Lainey • Dec 03, 2009 06:10 am
Assy Style Tight shirt, tight pants, big hair Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz continue to shoot Knight & Day in Seville, Spain, spotted yesterday walking around set. As you can see, he’s working it in a slimming black tight tee with brown skinnies like he wishes it was 1999, or that he could style it like Brad By Lainey • Dec 02, 2009 02:13 am
