Cheese Fake castles, glass slippers, and Vagina Virgins One of the Jonas Brothers got married recently. According to Michelle’s Boy Band Theory, it was the irrelevant one. Or the least attractive one. What? It’s not like you weren’t thinking it. Anyway, the oldest Vagina Virgin is now supposedly not a Vagina Virgin anymore because there By Lainey • Dec 29, 2009 08:12 am
Cheese Mimi Cheese Balls & A Tree Shiloh heard my prayer. My mother hopped on the Chinese Lady Express Bus for Casino Rama today. We won’t see her til dinner time. Unless of course she’s on a super hot streak in which case we may not see her for a week. Shiloh’s benevolence is By Lainey • Dec 22, 2009 07:13 am
Cheese When Mimi goes to Aspen… The result is always PURE GOLD. Of course she’s always pure gold but in Aspen it’s like the cheese concentration is extra strong. Every winter there’s an Aspen adventure. Every winter it’s her Christmas gift to the world. Here she is, squeezed into a tight pair By Lainey • Dec 21, 2009 04:41 am
Cheese Best/Worst of 2009: Fergie Wedding Cheese Maybe if you sell your wedding photos to a magazine you’re just f-cking asking for it. In light of what happened after… well… enough said. Remember these pictures? The original article is here and the entire album is here. The black and white ones, really, are the worst of By Lainey • Dec 17, 2009 09:16 am
Cheese Butterfly Kisses Nick Cannon was mauled by a butterfly last night on the red carpet of the Teen Nick Halo Awards. Oh Mimi. She always makes me happy but these…these are extra extra cheesy special. Notice how she’s STILL TRYING TO POSE even when he’s coming in to kiss By Lainey • Dec 10, 2009 07:05 am
Cheese Mimi H.A.T.E. U It’s her new video. The one she was shooting on the beach – click here for a refresher. Her efforts that day have now been released. The juiciest 3 minutes of your day. Mimi’s into the mono-kini right now. It’s almost like an audition for Sports Illustrated. Or By Lainey • Dec 09, 2009 03:00 am
Maple Leaf We need more Celine Mimi’s Cheese is coming up soon but first… You’d have to be humourless not to find joy in these photos of Celine Dion and her family at the Knicks game the other night in New York. What happens when the chest thumping lunge happy most expressive French Canadian By Lainey • Dec 09, 2009 02:51 am
Cheese She always comes through… When I need her. It’s been a rough week work-wise and other. Also I’ve been training like a fiend and “eating healthy” pre-holidays which means chicken every day, hate chicken to begin with, and nothing greasy and certainly no fried rice. Where is the joy? There is no By Lainey • Dec 03, 2009 10:28 am
Cheese Cheese Garters and the beach Best way to wash the sick of Polanski away? Mimi Cheese! Who else would appear on Ellen and show off her garters? Please. I just watched it this morning. It’s making up for the rain. She managed to walk by herself up to the couches. SO. PROUD. I have By Lainey • Nov 05, 2009 04:43 am
Cheese The best anniversary present EVER Sasha sent this over a while ago and I feel, like, GIDDY. High. Euphoric. As she put it, it’s like finding a f-cking pot of gold. There is SO much gold here. The way she can find an opportunity to burst into song, her OWN song, at any point By Lainey • Nov 02, 2009 07:50 am
Cheese Angel Cheese Hello Kitty’s official anniversary is November 1st. But Mimi can’t go as Hello Kitty for Halloween every year, hell no. Especially now that her costume carries double weight these days. Don’t forget about Nick. Oh but she brings such joy. Mariah Carey is happiness. Don’t tell By Lainey • Nov 02, 2009 02:46 am
Cheese Mimi Cheese in Rio Happiness is a rainy Friday Cheese break. It’s Mariah Carey, of course, tottering around in Rio yesterday. Her heels were too high and the surface too uneven for her to stick her ass and tits out in her signature pose but I do love the way that security man By Lainey • Oct 23, 2009 03:42 am
Cheese Cheese break Mimi’s husband did not accompany her to Japan. Instead, he stayed back in New York and attended the Keep A Child Alive Black Ball last night. There was a time when, briefly, I flirted with the idea of making Nick Cannon my boyfriend. Drumline. I loved Drumline. He was By Lainey • Oct 16, 2009 04:50 am
Cheese Cheese’s 2nd home Mimi arrived in Tokyo today. Please. It’s like she takes her Cheese there for the restorative powers of the Far East. Hello Kitties make it stronger. See? Straight off the plane she’s already at the top of her cheddar: the ass is extra out one way, the tits By Lainey • Oct 15, 2009 07:02 am
Cheese Hello Chiizu It comes with an accent. I wish I could post my voice recording it for you here because it’s way more entertaining when you know how to say it. Haaaa-low Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-zoooooooooooooooooooo. Let it stretch out of your mouth, and do it in a baby voice, and smile big the By Lainey • Oct 07, 2009 03:54 am
Cheese Still paying for the fake castle Oh Adrien Brody. He must be poor. It’s the only explanation. Just over a year ago, TIFF 2008, he was in Toronto for The Brothers Bloom. Duana and Michelle really enjoyed The Brothers Bloom. And we were all Brody fans. In person he has a style about him, an By Lainey • Oct 07, 2009 03:10 am