Douchebags Carb Face and his gray pants There’s a saying in Chinese: One type rice feeds one hundred type people. Sort of like…to each their own. Or, as my mother so gracefully reminded me when I told her one day that I could get away with a short skirt: whores eat our rice too. If By Lainey • Jul 21, 2008 04:17 am
Douchebags Barenaked Douchebag So you know about the arrest – Steven Page of Barenaked Ladies and some skanks somewhere in New York charged with cocaine possession. F*cking hypocrite. Family values and squeaky clean and a children’s album and in the end a f&cktard. Not only because of this scandal but By Lainey • Jul 17, 2008 08:20 am
Douchebags Broken Friendships, Broken Homes In the new issue of People Magazine, Sienna Miller’s people insist she’s not a homewrecker because Balthazar Getty and his wife have been “living separate lives” for a while. Still, the experience has been “humiliating” for Rosetta Getty and she’s apparently pissed as sh*t that she By Lainey • Jul 17, 2008 03:58 am
Douchebags Pippy at the ESPYs Justin Timberlake hosted the ESPYs last night and tried to be funny. Pipsqueak performed an “original rock opera”, paying homage to everyone from Tiger Woods to the Boston Celtics, and belittling Jessica Simpson, which wouldn’t be the first time. A few years ago, Pippy hit up Saturday Night Live By Lainey • Jul 17, 2008 02:36 am
Douchebags Ugly Junior kissy face Try not to Rossum. Tori Spelling and that piece of sh*t she married, Kevin Federline Jr, decided they haven’t been getting enough attention lately, so yesterday, the two ran into some paps to get their picture taken. Just to make sure we know how desperate they are, Junior By Lainey • Jul 16, 2008 07:42 am
Douchebags Princess AssTalk gets a tumour! Katherine Heigl is an ungrateful bitch. And Shonda Rhimes is going to punish her. Do you love it, or do you LOVE it? Following her asstalking remarks a few weeks ago about withdrawing her Emmy nomination because in her estimation the Grey’s Anatomy writers didn’t deserve one, Katie By Lainey • Jul 16, 2008 07:24 am
Douchebags Pip eats without his ass As my mother would say… Why this happening? Pipsqueakweasel Justin Timberlake eating out without his Shelf Ass Jessica Biel? Impossible! Yet here he is – JT last night photographed outside a restaurant in Beverly Hills and no Shelfy in sight, which only means that we’ll be seeing Shelfy clinging to By Lainey • Jul 09, 2008 12:16 pm
Douchebags Groupie Sex John Mayer played in front of a small crowd yesterday in New York and was asked a question from the audience about whether or not he’d ever had sex with a groupie to which he replied: "Do you respect my honesty? Yes, I have.” And of course, for By Lainey • Jul 09, 2008 04:37 am
Douchebags Junior’s First Daughter Just got back from orthopaedics for a progress scan and rehab on my arm. Am not Tiger Woods. Will not be playing golf and winning the US Open 8 weeks after surgery. F*cking Mischa Barton. Anyway, an appointment at ortho is a long drawn out process. Waiting room, then By Lainey • Jul 03, 2008 09:58 am
Douchebags The Double Save-Face Pippy Le Pew is currently starring in a box office bomb. Annihilated by critics and passed over by the public, The Love Guru is expected to drop steeply in just its second weekend. Justin Timberlake, although he refuses to take ownership, is still smarting from the failure. His Shelf Ass By Lainey • Jun 27, 2008 02:47 am
Twats Big Brother Pays for Pam It was announced the other day that Big Brother Australia is bringing in Pamela Anderson for a special appearance on the new season. Since she can’t act, and isn’t good for much else but taking off her clothes, this has become her career. She hired to show up By Lainey • Jun 26, 2008 04:52 am
Douchebags Of course he is Pippy Le Pew Justin Timberlake claims he suffers from OCD. But of course he does. All artists have compulsions, right? And Pip is, above all things, indisputably an artist. "I have OCD mixed with ADD. You try living with that. It"s complicated”, he said. No douchebag… it’ By Lainey • Jun 25, 2008 03:35 am
Douchebags Troy Dyer 2008 1995/1996. Reality Bites was my life. Final year of university, no clue what to do, a lifelong obsession with Winona Ryder, I smoked cigarettes incessantly, cut my hair like her shag, wore baggy dresses over tank tops and chucks, never went to class, and videotaped the last 3 months By Lainey • Jun 25, 2008 01:47 am
Douchebags Jen’s Piece Looks Young and Hot John Mayer yesterday heading out of Amsterdam, presumably en route to England to hook up with Jennifer Aniston. Hate to say but he looks hot with his short fresh haircut. Hot and young. Which of course only works in her favour. As you’ve read from all the stories in By Lainey • Jun 25, 2008 01:43 am
Douchebags Sean Fashionisto - you are not Tom Ford Sit DOWN Sean Avery! The most despicable man in hockey spent several weeks interning at Vogue and now reckons he"s Tom Ford. However, the fashionisto f*cker got all dolled up the other day for an REM concert in head to toe black with a matching pageboy cap By Lainey • Jun 24, 2008 05:42 am
Douchebags Pippy Le Pew Pipsqueak popped up in Paris yesterday to do a little shopping. Shelfy was not with him in person but, as usual, she was soon present in spirit, as rumours started circulating in America almost immediately that Justin picked up a bauble or two for her. Jessica Biel’s publicist never By Lainey • Jun 24, 2008 02:34 am
