Douchebags The Ingrate: A History The Princess of AssTalk wants off Grey’s Anatomy which is why she mouthed off a couple of weeks ago about the weakness of the writing, hiding her ulterior motives behind a pathetic attempt at “honour” to fleece the MiniVan Majority. You will note…People Magazine has still not reported By Lainey • Jun 23, 2008 02:46 am
Douchebags Golden Showers on the Road There will be no lucky fans invited back to John Mayer’s hotel room to be pee’d on this time. It appears John has found himself a travelling shower-girl. As I was the first to report a couple of weeks ago, Jennifer Aniston is joining John for part of By Lainey • Jun 23, 2008 01:27 am
Douchebags Steve > Mike Hate being wrong. But love being wrong when it means Mike Myers sucks ass. And Mike Myers sucked very large ass this weekend at the box office. A fourth place finished. FOURTH!!! Not only was he unable to win, he couldn’t even make it close! The Love Guru is By Lainey • Jun 23, 2008 01:20 am
Douchebags Why are they apart? No really…why? Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen – they should totally be together. Is there a more perfect couple? These assholes deserve each other! It’s a mystery why they split! As you know, they’ve been fighting forever about their kids, over money, terms of the divorce… now a By Lainey • Jun 19, 2008 02:23 am
Douchebags Intro for Jun 17, 2008 Dear Gossips, If you’ve been visiting this site for a while and familiar with the riddles, this portrait of Mike Myers from Entertainment Weekly shouldn’t surprise you. Perfectionist? Or a pain in the f&cking ass? According to his supporters, his “comic genius” allows him licence to By Lainey • Jun 17, 2008 12:48 am
Douchebags Kate & Lance: Family Weekend It’s been almost a month since word got out that they’re dating but it looks like player vs player has turned into something more serious. At least that’s the assumption considering they’re not just f&cking, they’re also spending some quality family time. First By Lainey • Jun 16, 2008 01:49 am
Douchebags Baby Balls Meets Golden Balls Pipsqueak and David Beckham at the Laker Game last night, quite obviously a meeting of the minds. Next to the Golden Balls, Pippy’s undropped handicap is all the more evident. But Becks is hot, isn’t it? As for Justin, didn’t see Shelf Ass Jessica Biel, which would By Lainey • Jun 13, 2008 02:41 am
Douchebags No Shelf on the Carpet The PipWeasel last night on the carpet for the premiere of The Love Guru which – maybe it’s just me – looks like total ass. Even the trailer. Get Smart instead, ok? After all, Steve Carell deserves it more than Mike Myers. And at least Steve isn’t a crazy unfunny By Lainey • Jun 12, 2008 02:44 am
Douchebags Pippy Putts It hurts me to post these. It hurts to look at my golf clubs collecting dust in the closet. Just before breaking my arm, I had finally figured out my short game. Was supposed to break 100 this season. Many times. F*cking Mischa Barton. This is Justin Timberlake in By Lainey • Jun 06, 2008 09:55 am
Douchebags Carb Face & Abbie Go Public Last night at the Australian in Film Breakthrough Awards, Ryan Phillippe and Abbie Cornish arrived together – their first time in public as a couple. Apparently they were sweet and loving and he had his arm around her and as you would expect, because this was reported in People, they seemed By Lainey • Jun 06, 2008 03:40 am
Douchebags Pippy’s Balls Pulled Back I reported earlier that Pipsqueak Justin Timberlake’s people were trying to force through a contract obliging journalists covering the Love Guru junket to report only what they approved. According to Sharon Waxman the studio has since backed down in the face of mounting resistance. In other words, Pippy got By Lainey • Jun 05, 2008 07:13 am
Douchebags Sit DOWN Justin Timberlake Seriously … sit your Pip ass DOWN! I call it Small Ball Syndrome. Not unlike Napoleon Syndrome. You know how they say short dudes overcompensate for their vertical challenges by going overboard on toughness and aggression? Well since Pipsqueak’s balls have only partially dropped, it’s like he’s trying By Lainey • Jun 05, 2008 03:01 am
Douchebags Junior Gets Richer Kevin Federline Jr has much to celebrate today. It has been confirmed that his wife Tori Spelling will reprise her role as Donna Martin in the new 90210 debuting this fall. Donna owns a swanky boutique in Beverly Hills. Given that Tori’s late father Aaron produced the original, it’ By Lainey • May 27, 2008 06:26 am
Douchebags John Takes Jen on the Road From Miami to Orlando! Jennifer Aniston is taking her sizzling spring fling with John Mayer on the road! John was booked for a private RIM performance in Orlando last night and flew via private jet with Jen and her dog Norman. Norman is so cute. Look at him. Look at By Lainey • May 14, 2008 06:40 am
Douchebags Another Case of Pip Hypocrisy Madonna made him hot…but he’s still a f&cking douchebag. Justin Timberlake has signed with MTV to produce a reality tv show called The Phone, kinda like a Bourne Identity meets the Amazing Race which, to be fair, is not the kind of reality show about twats By Lainey • May 09, 2008 06:35 am
Douchebags The Difference of a Year Last year John Mayer was accompanied by Jessica Simpson to the Costume Institute Gala. She wore a Cavalli that was too small, resulting in back fat and Lara and I lost our sh*t. It was the beginning of the end. Shortly after that, John and Jessica parted ways. Twelve By Lainey • May 06, 2008 04:52 am
