Dumbass Hollywood Sliding Doors: Jessica Biel edition Many of you have emailed about Jessica Biel’s quote in the new issue of ELLE magazine. You know, about the fact that she could have been Allie Hamilton to Ryan Gosling’s Noah Calhoun in The Notebook? Apparently it’s the “role that got away”: “The Notebook. That’s By Lainey • Nov 03, 2011 08:30 am
Baby and Bump Obsession Porny’s pregnant Halloween Jessica Simpson officially officially announced on her website yesterday that she and that freeloader are expecting. Apparently she’d been planning it for a while. Even put together a special “mummy” Halloween/White Snake video photo shoot. How about the fact that it took a gag costume for her to By Lainey • Nov 01, 2011 07:39 am
Girly Throw Downs Coincidence or Conspiracy: Porny Pregnancy edition Jessica Simpson used to date Tony Romo, the sh-tty quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys. Romo is now married to Candice Crawford. He and Crawford were engaged within a month of Porny’s engagement to that loser with no job who lives in her house. Porny, quite obviously, is pregnant. And By Lainey • Oct 25, 2011 05:16 pm
Twats Lindsay Lohan is unfulfilled She was back in court today. TMZ had the play by play. Judge Sautner revoked her probation. Lindsay Lohan is due back in court on November 2 - my wedding anniversary! - to see if she has to go to jail. Among the issues reviewed to determine if she violated By Lainey • Oct 19, 2011 02:33 pm
Dumbass Put it down and walk away Do you watch Misfits? Have you been reading long enough to roll your eyes every time I jerk off over Misfits? Look at my Five List. That’s how hard I am for Misfits (although Sheehan should come off soon because, well, Nathan is no more). And why haven’t By Lainey • Oct 19, 2011 11:11 am
Famewhores As IF Ashley Greene There’s a new Twilight movie coming out in a month. Just today I received an email from a friend about it (Relax, I’m not outing you, you can read the rest of the article without panicking) and she was wondering if she should go to see it at By Lainey • Oct 18, 2011 02:59 pm
Dumbass Men love Kanye, Ryan, no Hamm? “Top” lists to me are weird. Some names on the lists I totally, totally understand. Others... ??? Askmen.com has announced its annual Top 49 Most Influential Men of 2011 list. Steve Jobs is #1. Completely. Sure. Seal Team Six is #2. Fine. Then Larry Page and Warren Buffett which, HUH? By Lainey • Oct 18, 2011 12:16 pm
Douchebags Kate’s travelling with Mr Rocknroll Check out Kate Winslet arriving in San Francisco on Friday with her new boyfriend Ned ROCKNROLL. Yes, as already noted, that is his name. It is his REAL NAME. It is not like a costume that he can take off, a goofy Halloween gag or a temporary tattoo. No. That By Lainey • Oct 17, 2011 10:45 am
Dumbass A million little excuses We’ll get to her janky teeth in a minute... First there’s the matter of her community service. TMZ reports that Lindsay Lohan was fired from the Downtown Women’s Centre in LA because, well, either she never showed up as scheduled or when she did she booked it By Lainey • Oct 14, 2011 10:27 am
Twats Dentist. She needs one. Badly. This is Lindsay Lohan last night in LA at the Saints Row: The Third party. You know, I have to get over my prejudice against video gaming events as, like, celebrity stops. Video games are throwing the most money around these days. The famous people, they By Lainey • Oct 13, 2011 10:25 am
Dumbass Hot tubs & Rings I’m sure by now you’ve seen the cover of the new issue of Star Magazine? It’s attached. With photos of Ashton Kutcher on his 6th wedding anniversary in San Diego where he hosted a hot tub party in his hotel suite and allegedly f-cked at least one By Lainey • Oct 06, 2011 10:28 am
Dumbass Sit DOWN Johnny Depp Johnny Depp is promoting The Rum Diary. He sat down for an interview with Vanity Fair. It’s terrible. Maybe his worst. First there’s the rape comment. When he’s posing for a photo. When it’s a photo shoot. When the camera is capturing a “sex symbol”, he By Lainey • Oct 04, 2011 01:20 pm
Assy Style If you’re not the bride... Would you choose this dress? Like, I get it that not all white dresses are necessarily bridal dresses, obviously. But this dress, seen here on Geri Halliwell at the Raisa Gorbachev Foundation party in London, THIS dress could only be a bridal dress. Right??? It was a fancy person party, By Lainey • Sep 22, 2011 10:22 am
Hook Ups Could you? I am a fickle, shallow person. So sometimes it’s hard for me to see past the initial superficial. I get that. Perhaps, then, in this situation, I lack the spiritual profundity to move beyond a name and focus instead on quality. Perhaps. UK tabloids are reporting that Kate Winslet By Lainey • Sep 22, 2011 03:12 am
Dumbass H7 must go everywhere Victoria Beckham is in New York for Fashion Week. She showed two collections. They were well received. She's also been shopping. Which means Harper Seven goes with her. On top of 7 inch heels. Many of you have been asking why Posh insists on carrying her baby in By Lainey • Sep 16, 2011 07:07 am
Twats Lohan throws a drink in front of her mother It’s fashion week in New York. Lindsay Lohan thinks she’s part of it. She’s been at a few shows. She thinks everyone is paying attention to her. And they are. But only because her lips are really f-cked up and she’s such a goddamn loser. Last By Lainey • Sep 15, 2011 06:11 am
