Emmy Awards 2008 Worst Emmy 2008: Not Alyssa Milano This is the only photo I could find. Which is shocking. Worst dressed photos sell almost as briskly as best dressed ones. …the f&ck was she thinking??? Am most offended by the small details. Like those shoes. Those Asian massage parlour shoes. Jessica Simpson shoes. Shoes for women By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:50 am
Girlcrushes Best Emmy: Tina Fey Here’s a novel idea: write before you can act. Tina Fey became famous for her brain and her sense of humour stands today as the most respected woman in the business. Do parent pimps look to Tina Fey for inspiration? Do they enroll their kids in creative writing instead By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:47 am
Assy Style Worst Emmy Hair: Jennifer Love Hewitt Size Two wore her hair for a small town prom. Or a small town wedding circa 1995. How the f&ck does this get past security? How the f&ck did she find a stylist even willing to do this? Ken Paves wouldn’t do this! Even Ken By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:44 am
Thinnification Best Emmy Hair: Felicity Huffman Super bob. Age appropriate bob. Unfussy and uncomplicated and it looks amazing on her. Her body looks amazing on her too. But some say Felicity Huffman can be a little too body focused… A lot of attention is being paid of late to young actresses on tv and their dangerous By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:31 am
Assy Style Worst Emmy Makeup: Eva Longoria Parker Too much hanging out with Posh. This is vintage Victoria Beckham: make everyone around you look worse. It’s working with Eva Longoria. And of course, it’s easy enough with Ken Paves cocking up her hair. The dress doesn’t help either. Of course it’s f&cking By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:27 am
Emmy Awards 2008 Most Emmy Overrated: Evangeline Lilly Everyone is losing their sh*t today over her dress. Really? She’s gorgeous, yes. Her skin is ridiculous, yes. Body is the tightest, yes. But the dress? Hate the crushed velvet. And that ratty fringe hanging off of it. Like some kind of converted 70s disco carpet from a By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:22 am
Quiveration Best Emmy Couple: Neil Patrick Harris Never mind that his boyfriend looks like a young waxy gay Val Kilmer. It’s not important. What’s important is that NPH is the hotness. And I want him. So poised, so self assured, so damn sexy in his confidence, such an inspiration for Zac Efron when he finally By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:16 am
Chinese Squawking Chicken Worst Emmy Couple: Patrick Dempsey & Mrs BitchFace Another carpet, another case of the BitchFace. She tried to smile and it almost incapacitated her. My mother calls it Fu Gwa Gon: Dry Bitter Melon Peels. Her godson married a Fu Gwa Gon. Even when she’s happy she looks like she’s at a funeral. One day a By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:11 am
Emmy Awards 2008 Most Emmy Boring: Lauren Conrad Her own dress was boring as f&ck. The dress she designed for the statue girls was boring as f&ck. And her presentation skills were the most boring as f&ck. So boring that poor David Boreanaz who unfortunately had to share the stage with her By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 03:04 am
Emmy Awards 2008 Best Emmy AssTalk up the ass: Conan O’Brien Katherine Heigl didn’t show but he called out the ungrateful Princess of Asstalk for the ungrateful asstalker she is: “At this point I had planned on doing a few more jokes…but Katherine Heigl told me she didn’t think my material was Emmy-worthy.” Love, love, love. Photo from By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:59 am
Girly Throw Downs Best Emmy Black: America Ferrera She’s perfect. And she glowed. And she lost to Tina Fey. Isn’t it an honour to lose to Tina Fey? I’d lose to Tina Fey every day and feel complete. Check out America Ferrera in a black gown she was born to wear. If she’s glowing By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:54 am
Maple Leaf Best Emmy Canadian: Sandra Oh She brought her parents. And she was tiny. Ultra tiny. But at least she wasn’t her usual ultra bitch. Not that that’s a bad thing. That Sandra Oh has a bite. That she is not an easy woman. That she can be testy and irritable and totally unaccommodating. By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:51 am
Assy Style Most Emmy Endearing: Jenna Fischer She’s not a fashion girl. So the dress… it’s obviously not the best. Far from the best. But it was a sweet effort, if not the most fashionable. Let’s focus instead on premiere week. The Office is back on Thursday and do we worry for Jim and By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:45 am
Chinese Squawking Chicken Worst Emmy Wrinkle: Nicolette Sheridan It’s a bold idea. But is bold good? I have a thing about wrinkles. It’s from my mother. She irons everything. And she would say, if she could see this dress… Chow chow. Chow is wrinkly in Cantonese. We like to repeat adjectives twice for added effect. Chow By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:40 am
Emmy Awards 2008 Best Emmy Comeback: Debra Messing She has been underwhelming for a long time. But last night, Debra Messing came roaring back. Love this dress so much. And it’s perfect on her. And she didn’t try too hard the way she normally does. No more Will & Grace can be humbling. She certainly needed By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:36 am
Assy Style Most Emmy Disappointing: Mary Louise Parker Love her. Which is why it’s so sad. That she shopped at a truck stop in Vegas. It’s the ruching down the front. And the bedazzled straps. You know who wears a dress like this? It’s That Girl from your husband’s office who drunk calls him By Lainey • Sep 22, 2008 02:32 am