Parent Pimps The Silver Fox hates hags Anderson Cooper and Tom Ford. Together. Can you imagine? Sigh. Gay men are so evolved. Especially the ones who are ready and willing to cut a bitch down. Of course you’d expect this from Tom…but from the Silver Fox too? Please. He’s the son of Gloria Vanderbilt. By Lainey • Aug 05, 2008 04:12 am
Famewhores No Hags in the Sisterhood Ali and Dina Lohan managed to scam their way into the Sisterhood 2 premiere the other night. Their show is sucking ass…they needed the publicity. Who the f&ck are those morons are wanting Ali’s autograph??? I want you to look at that child’s French manicure. By Lainey • Jul 30, 2008 07:20 am
Douchebags Shia: Adrian’s girl, drunk with dad, and pick-ups Turns out Shia LaBeouf’s passenger the night he tried to commit vehicular homicide was Isabel Lucas, girlfriend of Adrian Grenier, who was supposedly “testy” when asked about Isabel’s condition yesterday. Shia and Isabel are working together on Transformers 2, although Shia left the Troubadour alone, drunk off his By Lainey • Jul 29, 2008 03:01 am
Famewhores Two Old Hags Dylan said to me the other day that it’s scary being a single straight dude these days: “I keep givin’ the business to, like, 16 year olds.” He means with his eyes. He keeps eyef7cking the underage ones, thinking they’re legal, only to find out he was 5 By Lainey • Jul 28, 2008 03:44 am
Parent Pimps Little McBongo JKL OK! Magazine reportedly paid $3 million for the first photos of little Levi McBongo, first son of Matthew McConaughey and his girlfriend Camila Alves. As I said last week about it being a waste of money – again another newborn that looks exactly like all newborns. Could you really pick Levi By Lainey • Jul 23, 2008 04:25 am
Parent Pimps Mama Pimp on the town Last night was the perfect night for Dina Lohan. Trading on one child to pimp the other, getting photographed and partying her tits off – the most ideal of situations. This is Dina in New York at the Sephora 10th anniversary celebration with son Michael Lohan who must be her Plan By Lainey • Jul 18, 2008 03:05 am
Parent Pimps Meet Honor OK! Magazine paid $1.5 for the first exclusive rights to Jessica Alba’s baby and follow up photos later on. So here’s Jessica with Honor on the cover of the new issue. No offence to all you moms out there but really, this baby obsession is out of By Lainey • Jul 16, 2008 03:18 am
Parent Pimps Jailbait Bradshaw She’s not quite Emmy Rossum – is it right to hate someone so young? – but she’s almost there… Disney’s most profitable virgin, Miley Cyrus, wants to become her generation’s Carrie Bradshaw, revealing to TV Guide that she’d “love to do a younger, cleaner version of Sex By Lainey • Jul 15, 2008 07:51 am
Parent Pimps Jailbait gets hacked Another round of Miley Cyrus “scandal” shots – scandalous for Disney, that is, but totally normal for any sex-obsessed, boy crazed 16 year old. The only difference is that THIS 16 year old has become a brand. A projected billion dollar brand. Once upon a time, teenagers were simply entertainers, which By Lainey • Jul 14, 2008 01:47 am
Parent Pimps Babies are for sale! The MiniVan Majority loves babies! The world loves babies! And thanks to the new power of the Yummy Mummy movement, getting pregnant has become the go-to career move in Hollywood, yielding the easiest paycheque ever. Pose with your newborn! Earn a million dollars! Or $3 million if you’re Matthew By Lainey • Jul 11, 2008 03:49 am
Famewhores Love Lessons from a 14 year old “These arms…they ache. And this soul…is in pain”. Lyrics from Ali Lohan’s new song All The Way Around in which she addresses learning from her love mistakes. What??? She’s 14!!! Although I suppose it’s not easy to remember that, given that Dina has whored her By Lainey • Jul 09, 2008 06:55 am
Parent Pimps Taupe and Violet smiling Taupe and Violet out and about today… and is it just me or is Jennifer Garner a little bigger ‘round the bust area? Jennifer Garner isn’t known for being chesty. These photos should give the bump nuts even more reason to flap, non? Once again, to reiterate, she and By Lainey • Jul 02, 2008 11:05 am
Sports Kicking off the Country Campaign It’s been brewing for a while but Jessica Simpson’s courtship of the country circuit is moving into a more aggressive stage. She showed up in Nashville and surprised fans with an impromptu autograph session at the CMA Music Festival Block Party on Wednesday and sampled some local nightlife By Lainey • Jun 06, 2008 04:50 am
Sports Pimping > Parenting Obviously it sucks for her love life… but it’s also f*cking embarrassing. To have the reputation that not only can she not hold a man, she needs daddy to hold on to him for her, and as always, at the heart of it all, a father who cannot By Lainey • Jun 05, 2008 02:26 am
Break Ups Why Jess Gets No Respect Because she has to beg for love. Over and over and over again. Three relationships and three times it’s been the same bitter end, to say nothing of the fact that Adam Levine goes around telling people that she showed up to his hotel room wearing nothing but a By Lainey • May 26, 2008 02:18 am
Clown Smut Loves the Low Road Good form would be to refrain from warring publicly. To let the lawyers do the talking, like Paul McCartney, and take the high road. Charlie Sheen doesn"t even know what the high road looks like. Why would he? Especially against a low road whore like Denise Richards...his By Lainey • May 22, 2008 04:30 am
