Two years ago we were looking for a “Becky” or, more precisely, “Becky with the good hair”. The BeyHive identified Rachel Roy as the best possible candidate. Rachel tried to deny it but…she still didn’t want to be anywhere near Beyoncé when Beyoncé showed up.
After “Becky” though, we now have a Biter. Who Bit Beyoncé ? is the question we’re all asking after Tiffany Haddish spilled the tea in her interview with Caity Weaver in GQ. Some of you are now just as worried about Tiffany as you are about the Biter. As everyone knows, the first rule of hanging with Beyoncé is that you don’t talk about Beyoncé. So will Tiffany be excommunicated? I can’t see Beyoncé minding what Tiffany said. The story doesn’t hurt Beyoncé, not at all. If anything, it adds to the Mystery Of Beyoncé, which at this point is a living organism. Beyoncé, as we know, doesn’t do interviews, doesn’t explain, does not give us the answers. The less she speaks, the more everyone else does:
You know you that bitch when you cause all this conversation
Beyoncé isn’t mad at Tiffany. Not when Tiffany is doing the work of a disciple. Not when the whole gossip public is CSI-ing who could possibly have bitten her…and LIVED.
Not when, yet again, she has inspired the best of Twitter. There are too many to choose from but Duana sent this over last night and by the time I stopped laughing I wasn’t sleepy anymore:
Then of course Twitter magic never happens without Chrissy Teigen. God I love her.
I cannot leave this planet without knowing who bit Beyonce in the face— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) March 26, 2018
Update it is NOT the person I think is the worst. IM DONE— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) March 26, 2018
You’ll note though that Chrissy did confirm that it’s not Gwyneth Paltrow. Like emphatically not Gwyneth. This is how Chrissy feels about Gwyneth:
no I love her!— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) March 26, 2018
Did I just make your day worse?
More on Who Bit Beyoncé later. But remember, all of this only adds to the Beyoncé Mystique. Tiffany won’t be punished for that.
Here's Chrissy running errands with John Legend and Luna yesterday in New York.
Yours in gossip,