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Last night in Milan at the Vertu Global Launch of the Constellation, whatever that means, here are Uma Thurman - looking amazing - and Tilda Swinton looking like Tilda so, obviously, awesome, and the both need to stand up straight because I want to see who’s taller.

Celebrities, as you know, are always smaller in real life. Little. With very few exceptions. Tilda in real life is gigantic. And I mean that in the best possible way. Same goes for Uma. Nicole Kidman too. I love seeing two trees side by side. Everyone else looks like a baby child. Look at Michelle Yeoh. Michelle Yeoh is exactly what I am when I’m with Duana and our friend Michelle. The three of us we went on a trip to Europe together three years ago now and when we’d walk down the street I used to wonder if people thought they were lesbians who’d adopted a Chinese orphan. Duana and Michelle are Women. I am the oldest. And I will always be the junior.

Goes back to that amazing article Duana wrote about Tall Is Not Cute that elicited such a vociferous response. Uma has never been cute. Nor Tilda. Rather, they understand theirs is an entirely different aesthetic.

Photo credits: Dave Benett/Vittorio Zunino Celotto/Getty

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