Selena Gomez is still in Paris, still hanging out with Brooklyn and Nicola Peltz-Beckham. I am fascinated by what they talk about. They are obviously close friends, this is an inner circle we are witnessing, but like…what do they talk about? 


To be quite frank, I had no opinion of Selena prior to Only Murders in the Building. I’m too old for Wizards of Waverly Place, so she just wasn’t really on my radar beyond gossip beats like her (past) relationship with Justin Bieber. But since OMITB, I now have Selena Opinions. And one opinion is that Selena Gomez is lowkey very witty. Her performance as Mabel is full of wit, obviously, but the way Steven Martin and Martin Short enthusiastically dote on her says a lot. I’ve encountered both of them. You are on your toes in both cases. You keep up or they—especially Martin Short—will chew you up and spit you out. 

But they love Selena! She is on her toes, she is keeping up. They adore her, which says a lot about who Selena Gomez is, as a colleague and as someone they have spent a LOT of off-camera time with, at awards shows, press events, et cetera. I have no problem imagining the conversations she has with Steve Martin and Martin Short, I’ve had those conversations. But Brooklyn and Nicola. WHAT do they talk about? Cooking? Yachts? I KNOW they’re friends, I KNOW there’s a connection, I just…can’t picture the conversation. 


When it comes to celebrity couples, we often say “picture him on top of you” to judge a romantic relationship. With celebrity friends, it should be “picture the conversation”. This is a conversation I cannot picture. Taylor Swift and her squad? Gossiping about everyone else in the room all night long. Talking sh-t on Joe Jonas as we speak, no doubt. Maybe some business, maybe some real estate, because her girl group is high-powered and they’re dabblers, at the very least. But Selena and the Peltz-Beckhams? Do they talk about the latest sandwich Brooklyn made?

Here's Selena in Paris last night, looking amazing in this black corset and suit, out again with Brooklyn and Nicola, who continue to give me a case of face blindness.