At 9:20am this morning, they’re sticking a laser into my eye so that I (hopefully) won’t have to wear contact lenses and glasses anymore. Pre-op starts an hour before that. And after the procedure, I have to keep my eyes closed (sleep is strongly recommended) and/or avoid reading or watching TV and light, at least until the follow-up appointment 24 hours later.
The blog won’t be happening today. There may be a chance that it won’t happen tomorrow, although many have come back quickly, in just a day, and have been able to resume their regular lives. I’m hoping I’m one of the bionic ones.
Am very sorry about the inconvenience to your gossip schedule and will try my best to voodoo and feng shui everything I can out of my cells for quick healing. I’ve been ginseng-loading on the Squawking Chicken’s soup all week.
Please note however that Sasha’s fashion posts will still be up on LifeStyle later today – check back later this morning/early afternoon.
But… if you’d like to do some gossip homework…
Here are a few suggestions:
Read the full Jennifer Lawrence profile in Vanity Fair. I’ve just finished it and… we have a LOT to talk about… after you come out the coma that was induced by the series of eyerolls you’ll experience while making your way through it. Let me give you a taste:
Though Chris Martin, at 37, is 13 years Jennifer's senior, it's not surprising that she may have fallen for him. For one thing, she loves music--she played the oboe in middle school. "I can't really remember how to play anymore," she confessed.
WHO DOESN’T LOVE MUSIC?
And if that’s the case, why isn’t Kanye West in love with Chris Martin?
Next – read Lena Dunham’s book, Not That Kind Of Girl, if you haven’t already. Because she can write. And because even if you don’t agree with her, and even if you find her exhausting, she’s talking about the sh-t we should be talking more about.
Then… read Anne Helen Petersen’s first book, Scandals Of Classic Hollywood. AHP is a gossip. She’s a real life PhD gossip and not some old crusty c-nt who free-barfs all over her blog (me, obvs). The old school gossip is just as dirty and depraved. And she breaks it all down like a business case study. Click here for more information.
If you’d rather watch and not read, I’ve attached a video below. Some of you may have already enjoyed it, and if you have, well, then you understand why I want you to enjoy it again. For those of you who haven’t, I’m putting you on edge for 45 minutes while you sit through a party for Gwyneth Paltrow. Come on. She picked up on a Mozart beat WHILE SHE WAS IN THE WOMB. Why am I justifying this for you?
Finally…if you’re like me and you temporarily can’t use your eyes, there’s a podcast that Duana breathlessly recommended to me that I’ve already become addicted to. It’s from the people who gave us This American Life. And I was supposed to start AFTER my surgery but I cheated and opened it last night instead and now I’m addicted and – yay! – there’s a new installment! Click here but BE WARNED. You will not be able to stop. This is how I imagine it was like when people gathered around the radio in the living room – before we tweeted and swiped and downloaded while watching Scandal and the hockey game at the same time. It’s addictively intimate and warmly nostalgic, like story time in elementary school. With my eyes closed, then, I’ll be picturing us listening together at our virtual gossip daycare.
Hope to be back tomorrow.
But if I’m not…
Have a great weekend! And HAPPY THANKSGIVING Canada!
Yours in gossip,
PS. Thank you so much - AGAIN - for donating to my #FearlessChallenge in support of the Canadian Cancer Society. Click here for a refresher on why my challenge was to visit a haunted house . Like I said the other day, it was an old, abandoned home over a 100 years old in the middle of nowhere-f*ck. The guy in the video with me is a spirit-chaser, one of those spirit chasers. By the end of it, I basically begged him to let me go home. And I did get to home, safely (I think).
But for those who are fighting cancer, they have to be fearless every day. The #FearlessChallenge is meant to honour them and to stand with them. Your donations to the #FearlessChallenge are a symbol of solidarity as they face this disease -- and beat it. Thank you for your generosity.
Click here to learn more about the #FearlessChallenge.
And click here to watch the video of me at the haunted house. I'm not embedding it on my blog. You understand.
Mae Whitman stars in The Duff, an upcoming movie for which you need to know two pertinent pieces of information: first, it’s based on a book written by an author, Kody Keplinger, who was 17 at the time of publication; second, and the one you’ll hear most about, is that “Duff” stands for “Designated Ugly Fat Friend”. Full Story
Six months ago, Emma Watson was named UN Women Goodwill Ambassador. She spoke at the UN in New York yesterday to promote a campaign called HeForShe, encouraging men to advocate for women’s rights and gender equality. Her speech was thoughtful and inclusive, arguing that gender stereotyping disadvantages men too – in their roles as fathers, and/or if they are dealing with mental illness, and/or if they are pressured to conform to the social expectation of how a Man should be. Full Story
I’ll Give You The Sun.
A new book by Jandy Nelson, available today and, with 3 months to go, quite possibly my favourite book of 2014. I’m telling you right now, clear your weekend because as soon as you start, you won’t want to do anything else. And then give yourself a few hours and read it all over again.
This is a story you want to rip through, because you care so much about Noah and Jude, you want to know what happens. At the same time, you’ll have to keep reminding yourself to sloowwwwww down. Because Nelson’s voice is so fresh and so full of …well, of everything…you won’t want to miss a single detail. And that’s what’s exciting. There are paragraphs in this book that are so f-cking good, so well-written and imaginative, the reading experience becomes a thrill-ride, when all you’re really doing is lying in bed with a book. Read Full Intro
Keith Urban stopped by the set of The Family Fang today in New York to visit Nicole Kidman. The two were seen walking around holding hands. The Family Fang, as you know, is based on the book of the same name by Kevin Wilson. I was excited about the prospect of Nicole playing Camille. Turns out she’s playing daughter Annie. Full Story
Woman – An Anthology is a collection of short stories featuring the work of renowned writers Stephen King, Alice Munro, Lynn Coady, Robert E Howard, and more. All proceeds from the sale of Woman – An Anthology will support the Breast Cancer Society of Canada, funding programs that focus on both research and prevention. Only 1000 copies of the book will be released in hardcover in the fall.
A Kickstarter campaign is now underway to finalise the project, covering printing and production costs only. It’s a modest goal and they are almost there. Please click here to learn more about Woman – An Anthology and to help if you can. It’s a celebration of Woman in word. Read Full Intro
Warner Bros has acquired the rights to Donna Tartt’s The Goldfinch in partnership with RatPac Entertainment. That’s Brett Ratner’s company. Does it bite your ass that he called his company RatPac? I mean I get it. His last name is Ratner. But…that’s kind of…like…it’s the Rat Pack. Like Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr and Dean Martin and… REALLY???
Anyway, Tartt’s first book The Secret History – which I loved so much even though it f-cked me up for a week and it’s on my 25 book list here -- was also optioned by Warner Bros years ago but nothing ever happened. Did you know that Gwyneth Paltrow and her brother were once considering adapting it? (Charles and Camilla Macaulay!) It’s the kind of story David Fincher would be great at. Read Full Intro
Pacific Coast News
Nicole Kidman acquired the rights to Kevin Wilson’s The Family Fang almost 3 years ago. Click here for my coverage of the story and my thoughts on the book. Briefly, The Family Fang is about Caleb and Camille Fang, renowned performance artists, who use their children in controversial public stunts (one of them involved the father prostituting his kids in a mall), secretly videotaping the public’s reaction, and then screening the footage at museums and galleries like it’s creative genius. Full Story
I don’t want to discount the importance of Marvel choosing to reimagine Thor as a woman for a new comic book run. It’s important that kids—any kid—looks at the characters we deem heroic and see themselves reflected back, and Marvel Comics has been diligent about diversifying their superheroes over the years. Full Story
Lea Michele is on holiday in Mexico with friends. Here she is at the resort enjoying some down time. She was working on Glee all year. She promoted her new album. And a book too. Am always curious about how songwriters pick songs – for other artists and themselves. Sia worked with Lea on her record but none of that material comes close to Chandelier. Full Story
Best gossip you’re going to read all week, I promise. Molly Bloom has written a book. She’s the woman who hosted high stakes poker games in Hollywood, known as the Poker Princess. Bloom not only organised the games, she also allegedly arranged for “massage therapists” to come in when players were tense. Full Story
Box office experts are predicting that The Fault In Our Stars will be #1 this weekend, ahead of Tom Cruise’s Edge Of Tomorrow. People really loved that book. As previously noted, I did not love that book. I mean it was OK, it didn’t suck. But it didn’t affect me the way it affected so many other millions, or the way I was affected by Eleanor & Park.
Still, the success of The Fault In Our Stars illuminates a much more interesting new “phenomenon”: the Book Girls. And their influence is becoming increasingly more powerful.
There was a tie at the Spelling Bee!
God I love the Spelling Bee.
If there’s anything that makes me hate people a little less, it’s the Spelling Bee. It’s these two kids going home every single day after school and studying the dictionary. It’s the look on their faces when they get it wrong. It’s the relief on their faces when they get it right. Once in a while though, when it’s a word they can definitely spell, that they definitely studied, you might see a cocky breeze pass through their eyes – just a quick moment, but that’s the hit that keeps us, them, coming back.
Nothing feels as good as knowing the answer.
I wonder why people forget that.
Yesterday on The Social, we interviewed Katty Kay, author of The Confidence Code: The Science And Art of Self-Assurance – What Women Should Know. Read Full Intro