The Gwyneth Paltrow Members Club

It makes sense. Because she runs in such exclusive company. Like if we were talking about children, hers would be the most exclusive treehouse in the neighbourhood. And every kid within 50 blocks would want to be invited to this treehouse. But only few get the privilege.

TMZ reports that G is building a grownup Hollywood treehouse on the Sunset Strip. She and her business partner have acquired the Hustler store and plan to turn it into an Arts Club, like the one in Mayfair in London where she and Cameron Diaz once hung out with Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh. Click here for a refresher. G will sit on the board of directors. Which means she’ll be approving and/or rejecting membership requests. That’s basically her greatest skill in life: judging.

There will be a dress code, obviously. More importantly though, there will be a connections code. Like, what happens if Kate Bosworth wants in? Who does she get to vouch for her? Will Stella McCartney have to draft a special letter? THR posted an article a couple of weeks ago about Soho House and its admission policies. Apparently they’ve rejected Kanye West’s wife and Britney Spears several times because of the negative attention that they attract. Click here to read.

Soho House representatives claim that they have a “no assholes” policy. Um. Ashton Kutcher goes there but OK, why quibble on definitions. Soho House is planning on expanding to another LA location. And now G’s coming in with her own elite treehouse. It’s not that these people can’t afford a few thousand dollars in membership fees to several places at once. And they all co-exist in London so it’s not like one takes out the other. But there was a time, about 10 years ago, when it was all about the clubs. You remember Hyde? And the Brent Bolthouse era? When The Hills was a big deal and Paris Ebola the Hilton was a thing? Ebola’s not welcome at the membership places. So if you end up where it ends up, does that mean you couldn’t get in with G? G’s pushing a new hierarchy marker. Basically, if you’re seen at a place that doesn’t require an annual fee and board of governors’ sign-off, it’s a sign on your forehead spelling out You Are Nothing.

In other G news, her kids got a couple of rabbits for Easter.



New additions to the family! #thesmilesaysitall #happyeaster

A photo posted by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow) on


And she honoured her friend RDJ on his half century:



Before the clock strikes, one last happy birthday to a true great, Robert Downey Jr. Friend, brother, inspiration. 💝🎉🌟

A photo posted by Gwyneth Paltrow (@gwynethpaltrow) on


And she spent time with her cousin, Kate Moennig, one of the baddest bitches in Hollywood. Even Kate wants to hang with G. And don’t tell me it’s because it’s family. There are no family obligations in a f-cking selfie.



New family band #1nonblonde

A photo posted by Kate Moennig (@kateomoennig) on

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