Porny’s weekend wedding

July 7, 2014 13:28:49 Posted at July 7, 2014 13:28:49
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Jessica Simpson married Eric Johnson on Saturday. PEOPLE had the details first. And they’ve posted an exclusive sketch of her Carolina Herrera wedding dress with a tease to more wedding details in the next issue. Herrera even gave a statement to PEOPLE about the collaboration. In other words, PEOPLE paid. Which is no surprise. Where Porny is concerned, everything is for sale – the baby showers, the baby photos, the self-esteem through weight loss…everything.

But is it worth it?

Like, even Kanye West and his wife are giving away the first shots of their wedding on social media for free now. Doing it through a magazine almost feels old-school. Not old school cool though. More like old school loser. On the level of Kaley Cuoco. Actually, yeah, that’s about right. Porny and Kaley Cuoco is about right.

Then again, we are constantly hearing about how Porny “runs” her own billion dollar business. So whatever they paid for this event, and given the current celebrity economy, it can’t have been more than $250K or so, tops, it’s not like they couldn’t have gone without. Or, maybe, that’s how Johnson, the freeloader, the one decided not to go to business school at Wharton after they started dating, is making his. Maybe that’s the deal, since I can’t imagine Joe Simpson wouldn’t have locked down all of Porny’s assets in the event of a breakup. Maybe whatever they make off their personal life is his only source of income. 

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