Orly poses hard in Tokyo

August 19, 2016 19:34:10 Posted at August 19, 2016 19:34:10
Lainey Posted by Lainey
FameFlynet, Jun Sato/ Handout/ Getty Images

I posted shots of Orlando Bloom at LAX yesterday and it turns out he was heading to Tokyo for a British Airways promotional event. They still consider him a big star in Japan. Because he’s so pretty. I’m not sure Orly’s as effective an ambassador for British Airways in other parts of the world though. Or maybe that’s changed, now that we know how big his cock is.

Speaking of his cock, Seth Rogen is. Seth’s promoting Sausage Party, it’s a natural fit. And Seth has some thoughts about Orly’s cock and why he introduced it to us, telling the UK Sun that:

“I think the philosophy might be: ‘It’s a competitive market, I’m Orlando Bloom, I’ve been great for years but you know what, there are all these new kids out there — the Jamie Dornans of the world coming up — maybe I gotta show my dick to make people remember Orlando Blooms is a f*cking OG.”

Right. So even Seth Rogen thinks that Orlando Bloom’s penis has become his publicist? Sure, and his penis publicist is getting the job done:

“I would be lying if I said I wasn’t more inclined to put him in something now that I saw he has a great d*ck. You wouldn’t be on a paddle board with your cock out if you didn’t have a big dick. And he is a super nice guy. He is very nice.”

There you go. If Orlando Bloom ends up in the next Seth Rogen/Evan Goldberg movie, please credit his new publicist, his penis.

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