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Once upon a time, Sarah Jessica used to arrive at these awards shows screaming – please, please look at me. Please, please pick me! Pick me for best dressed. Pick me please!! These days however, the dubious honour has passed to Kate Beckinsale who wanted to be noticed so badly I could smell it from my television set thousands of miles away. Don’t me wrong. It’s a lovely dress. But she just tried so hard. Every step, every pose, every turn of the head, every angle – it was so laboured and so painfully self conscious that I just wanted tot pat her on her botoxed head and give her a gold star for her efforts. Pity, y’all. It’s a powerful emotion.

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