Sasha Answers: I’m 26 and he’s 19
Hi Sasha, So I'm 26 and I started secretly dating a 19 year old boy. We were friends before things got sexual and originally it started out as fun. He's so sweet and ambitious and funny and we have incredible sex. The thing is he recently told me he was in love with me and wanted to make things official. No one knows we're seeing each other and he's happy to keep it that way he just wants us to be exclusive.
The thing is, I like this idea and I have strong feelings for him but I can't stop telling myself that he's 19 and needs his freedom. Basically I want to know if I should cut him loose to be young or if I should allow things to get serious.
Is it bad that I can’t help but fixate on the age difference? I mean, I’m all for chicks bagging younger dudes, but like, he’s not even old enough to rent a car.
Okay, okay, I’ll stop being a prick. If you like him then fine, but S, this whole keeping it a secret thing is a bit strange to me. If buddy is dropping the L-bomb and you’re contemplating making it official, what’s with you keeping things on the DL? If you’re telling me that this is a mature relationship, well, sorry, but that seems pretty immature to me.
S, you’re playing it off like you’re worried about his freedom, but I’m calling bullsh-t. I feel like what you’re really worried about is saving some face. Look, I’m sure your feelings for him are legit, but I can’t help but think that you’re a bit embarrassed of word getting out that you’re dating, oh, you know, a teen. I don’t want to project, but that’s just what I’m sensing.
But wait S, are you throwing some f-ck yous my way right now? Have I made you mad? Well, if so, then hey-hey, maybeee you do really like this dude. And if that’s the case then, ignore me, ignore what others might say behind your back and just go for it. Stop holding back, let the relationship be known and give it a go.
Thanks for writing and keep me posted on the outcome. Keep all your questions coming my way at firstname.lastname@example.org