Tom Cruise Gossip

Tom Cruise gossip, latest news, photos, and video.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Not even a beautiful marathon bride and the impossibly adorable Little Sci could save Lions for Lambs at the box office this weekend. Because the MiniVan Majority couldn’t bring itself to support an anti-war message. As such, the GMD’s new movie performed miserably– at home and overseas – earning less than $7 million, though many were quick to point out that even that was more than Reese and Jakey’s Rendition last month.

But while Team Cruise warned early on, even before the Lambs release, that his intent with the new studio was never box office domination, Tom’s hardcore pimp of the film clearly belied the objective: he thought he could own it. And he failed. Even worse…he now has to answer to Xenu who is still expecting his 30%.

Brad, Angelina, Harry, Kate’s multiple lovers, multiple FNL quiveration, and a riddle!

It’s Monday – am blogging all day, check back often!

Yours in gossip,


PS. Am in Toronto for Virgin Unite’s Midnight Magic, raising funds to “purchase medicines, mosquito netting, and produce preventative information materials to be delivered through Virgin’s Heaven’s Angels project to remote rural areas of Sub-Saharan Africa.” Elvis Costello is performing, Dita von Teese is apparently debuting her new routine, and that magic freak dude who dated Cameron Diaz and claims to have not slept with Britney Spears will hopefully be levitating. Here he is at an event last week obviously NOT blessed with the Good Pants Gift.


In Hiding

November 12, 2007 10:14:54 Posted at November 12, 2007 10:14:54
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Don’t f&ck with Xenu. The book is due in January, not for another 2 months, but Andrew Morton, after going underground to write it, apparently has to stay underground even after its release. ESPECIALLY after its release. Which is great news. Because what’s in the book is SO explosive, Xenu’s disciples are angry. Full Story

The Unpopular GMD

November 9, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at November 9, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

There is a reason why the GMD and his Robobride have been hustling so hard on the MiniVan Majority. Because aside from a few famous friends who have ulterior motives themselves, Tom Cruise doesn’t appear to have many fans in Hollywood. And especially not heavyweights Robert Redford and Meryl Streep. Full Story

The Fertile Granny Freeze

November 9, 2007 07:15:56 Posted at November 9, 2007 07:15:56
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Sweet Xenu, the woman won’t stop. One day after one-upping every other woman on the red carpet at the CMAs, Nicole Kidman showed up in NYC last night to attend a screening for Margot at the Wedding, said to be a lovely little movie in which her forehead actually shows some movement. Shocking. Meanwhile, in support of Margot and the upcoming The Golden Compass, Nicole is now on promo circuit – her latest is an interview with Marie Claire in which she AGAIN discusses losing a pregnancy Full Story

The New Camelot in DC

November 8, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at November 8, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

So blatantly obvious and still the MiniVan Majority will eat his sh*t up – the GMD arrived with his Katie/Jackie in tow last night to screen Lions for Lambs in DC. As you can see, from the demure neckline to the simple chain to the dress and especially the shoes… Katie is now a Kennedy charged with the task of glamourising a Gay Midget Dwarf. Full Story

All Eyes on Granny Freeze

November 8, 2007 06:54:21 Posted at November 8, 2007 06:54:21
Lainey Posted by Lainey

At the CMAs last night there was little to no chance Kenny Chesney would lose to Keith Urban. Kenny’s crown was pretty much locked up. And so the Kidmans arrived with few expectations, showing up to save face and to promote Keith’s People Magazine cover and to make a glamourous announcement, despite unfounded whispers to the contrary, that he does indeed intend to honour his contractual obligations. Full Story

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Dear Gossips,

Lions for Lambs comes out on Friday which is why it’s GMD week! And while many prematurely proclaimed his professional death last year, even if Lions does not kill at the box office, it looks like Tom Cruise has officially re-installed himself on the power list, thanks to a fetching young wife and an irresistible Little Sci. Case in point – last night’s dinner at Cipriani in his honour brought out some major stars paying their respects. Everyone is kissing his ass. Sigh. It’s like he’s Voldemort…

As for Britney – how pathetic do you have to be to be ordered to PAY $120,000 for your ex husband to sue you over custody of your kids???

KFed apparently has no income other than the allowance he receives from his Chicken Fried Bankroll. And those monthly alimony payments totalling $15,000 are supposed to dry up in a week. As such, he can’t afford his legal fee. So he’s hitting her up to cover his bills – and she has to do it because she’s so f&cked in the head, she’s deemed less fit to parent their children than he is.

Only Britney could live a life this ass backwards.

Wednesday, blogging all day, check back often.

Yours in gossip,


MiniVan Tea Party and a Full on Assault

November 7, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at November 7, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

People Magazine is the Bible for the MiniVan Majority. And today, it is a full-on assault! On the cover of the latest issue of the magazine – Keith Urban, see attached, waxing hilarious about his employer wife, an exclusive deal likely scheduled well in advance withOUT considering Tom Cruise’s timing. Full Story

GMD Permed!!!

November 7, 2007 00:00:00 Posted at November 7, 2007 00:00:00
Lainey Posted by Lainey

All hail the Xenu! After much lobbying over the last few days, and much objection to the GMD’s pin straight hair, perm shots have surfaced showing the GMD with sweet waves! Check it out – first look at Tom in Valkryie, the film besieged with problems during shooting in Germany this past summer. Full Story

Workin’ It

November 7, 2007 06:24:17 Posted at November 7, 2007 06:24:17
Lainey Posted by Lainey

Damn. Look at KatE Cruise workin’ that carpet. She is spectacular! Clearly lessons with Posh have paid off, only Katie, like all clever pupils, has managed to inject her own warmth and sass into Posh’s plastic pose. Even the Posh Bob looks better on the understudy. Bet your concrete tits Mrs Beckham is not happy about that. Full Story

View All 8 Photos


November 6, 2007 07:09:35 Posted at November 6, 2007 07:09:35
Lainey Posted by Lainey

He’s wearing more blush than his wife. And for the last time, would someone please tell him that wearing tight pants and standing with his legs far apart WILL NOT make him look taller??? But seriously… I’m so glad he did. It’s like a superhero caricature just before he lifts one arm into the air and blasts off with hot jets steaming out of his ass. Full Story