Gwyneth’s bachelorette

Lainey Posted by Lainey at April 12, 2018 13:46:16 April 12, 2018 13:46:16

I just spent 20 minutes futzing with that title, even though I knew, I know, it doesn’t matter. You wouldn’t have given it a second thought. But I hate, HAAAAAAAAAAATE, the word “bachelorette” and I especially hate it when it’s being used to refer to a party for a woman who’s about to get married – “bachelorette party”, such a stupid f-cking expression. And “hen party”, which is what they call it in the UK and Australia, is even worse. But there are no alternatives. Somehow, for all the modern ways that we’ve been able to evolve words and phrases, we can’t come up with something better than “bachelorette party” or “hen party”. It makes me crazy. In the absence of adequate substitutions, “bachelorette” it is. And Gwyneth Paltrow is having hers. 

Page Six reports that Cameron Diaz arranged a private jet for a dozen of G’s friends to fly to Mexico for the weekend to celebrate the upcoming wedding. I can’t make out all the faces in these shots attached but for sure Stella McCartney is there too. Page Six is calling it a “wild VIP bachelorette”. 

Wild? 

What does “wild” look like where this crew is concerned? 

Gwyneth has said that she considers this wedding to be her “first”, even though she was married to Chris Martin. It’s because they eloped. There wasn’t much of a wedding or any of the traditions that precede one. So all signs point to the fact that this will very much be a WEDDING. Especially since she’s now a lifestyle expert – she’s going from having no wedding to the Ultimate Wedding. And the best part of that, because of goop, is that we’ll get to see it. For sure they’ll put it in the magazine. FOR SURE. Gwyneth has been coming for Martha Stewart for a while now. Her own wedding is the perfect platform from which to launch goop Weddings as she becomes the first goop Bride. 

So, if she’s having her bachelorette now, does that mean the wedding is soon-ish? It would have to be real soon to make it in time for the summer issue of goop. But, if we’re going on traditional magazine schedules, the most lucrative issue is the September issue, or the “fall” issue, since goop is a quarterly. If I had to bet, I would say it’ll be an early summer wedding for the fall 2018 cover. 

Photos:
Backgrid, Clasos.com.mx/ Splash News

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