Can you imagine how excited Marc Jacobs must have been to dress Cher for the MET Gala? Cher, as we all know, is usually associated with one designer: Bob Mackie. Mackie is apparently too busy to design her costumes for her new tour, appropriately titled Dressed To Kill. She was broken up about it a couple of months ago. Not sure if a Cher-Marc Jacobs collaboration is going to happen but that should be our collective hope.

Back to Cher + Bob Mackie though…

Because back in 1974, at the Costume Institute Gala, Cher went sheer. On a night when so many women went sheer, Cher was there to remind us who did it first.

So, now, onto Beyonce. Duana called it desperate. And she was sad about it. Because she almost always loves Beyonce at this event. Many of you felt that way too. You know what I think it is? It’s the hair. That f-cking hair IS desperate. There’s a line between costume and cartoon, you know? And that ponytail is what pushes it over the edge.

While it may be desperate, though, it’s also a distraction. She posted this on Instagram even before she arrived, and she was one of the latest, knowing that everyone would be waiting to see her in person, practically naked.


Met Gala 2015.

A photo posted by Beyoncé (@beyonce) on

Ironically, the Instagram shot, up against a concrete wall, is actually much more flattering than any of the shots on the carpet and steps. As soon as you take away her control over the image, she just looks like she’s jumping up and down, doing whatever she can to make you not talk about The Elevator.

Done. I guess?

No one’s talking about The Elevator.

But we are talking about why she had to try so hard. And I’m not sure that’s much better.