It’s my favourite story this week.

Remember when Jessica Simpson went out for dinner with her boyfriend at the same restaurant as her ex husband Nick Lachey and ‘Nessa Minnillo? Click here for a refresher.

According to Us Weekly, my Porny drank away her insecurities, and then let her bitch out, sniping to a server that, “I hope Vanessa likes her clothes because I bought them for her, since Nick took all my money.”

Witnesses that night tell the magazine that Porny appeared “nervous” and was tripping out because the situation was so “weird and awkward”. Not surprisingly, Simpson’s rep tells GossipCop that that’s not how it went down at all, that Jessica didn’t even know that Nick and Nessie were there.

Right. Because we all know publicists are honest. And also because we all know Jessica to be secure and confident, and wouldn’t get defeated in a staredown by an ex beauty queen who is now f-cking her ex?

PLEASE.

That is EXACTLY what went down. She started throwing back the shots and, emboldened by alcohol, she started getting nasty. And petty. It’s textbook. But give her a tv show, call it The Price of Beauty, and then invite her to speak like she’s some kind of inspiration at the Maria Shriver Women’s Conference...

Well that’s forward progress, isn’t it?


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Photos from Frederick M. Brown/Gettyimages.com