Gwyneth Paltrow covers the new InStyle. She looks great for the audience. Very relatable. Like the mom who just got a makeover as opposed to high fashion Tom Ford girl. G is the mom who won’t let her kids watch television unless it’s in French or Spanish. She told the magazine that Apple was apparently “cross” with her because:

“I only let them watch TV in French or Spanish. When I’m in France, I go to [Boulevard] Beaumarchais and buy all their cartoons.”

Naturally everyone’s calling her a stuck-up c-nt for making these remarks. But don’t you know any mommies who’re outlawing tv and video games in favour of enlightening pursuits? I don’t think I want to sh-t on her for wanting better for her kids. What I will say is that I don’t know if this particular audience is in a position to be able to do better for their kids the way GOOP does. How many of you can fly over to Paris and shop on the Boulevard Beaumarchais? How many Max Factor customers can?

G has just signed onto a 6 month deal with Max Factor, “the makeup of makeup artists”, as their spokesperson. This is confusing to me for two reasons: I have never known a makeup artist who uses Max Factor and also I don’t actually believe Gwyneth Paltrow uses Max Factor, do you?

One more interesting note about her interview with InStyle - the shade she seems to throw at her husband Chris Martin. When asked about their differences:

“Probably our artistic temperaments. Artists are sensitive; there are ups and downs mood-wise. Musicians need a certain gravitas and focus in order to write. The temperament that goes with someone who is creative can be challenging. I focus more on understanding than being understood.”

Basically she’s calling him a Drama Queen. Which I love. Because, let’s face it, he’s the lead singer of a big band. He IS a Drama Queen, I don’t give a sh-t how much you love Fix You. But to have your wife throw that in your face in a magazine? On the one hand of course it’s off-side. On the other, maybe that’s what you have coming to you when you’re running down the street, trying to get hit by a car just so that you don’t have to have your picture taken with her.