Dear Gossips,

Deadline reported exclusively yesterday that Warner Bros and Bradley Cooper are working on a deal for him to direct the third (or is it fourth?) remake of A Star Is Born. Warner Bros has a short list of favourite actors: Leonardo DiCaprio, Ryan Gosling, Tom Hardy, Ben Affleck. Right now, off the success of American Sniper, Cooper’s looking a lot like an Affleck contemporary. He’s arguably a better actor. And Clint Eastwood loves him. Eastwood was supposed to take on A Star Is Born. Obviously Cooper has his blessing.

In addition to directing though, if negotiations don’t fall through, Cooper would work on the screenplay and star in the film as well. I’m assuming that he would play Norman. And they’re hoping that Beyonce will play Esther. OK. But what era?

If we’re talking right now, in the spirit of Duana, I feel like he can’t be called Norman anymore. Because if we assume that Norman was born between 1970 and 1980, no one was calling their kid Norman. Michael? Sure. Jason? Fine. James? OK. Steve? Yep. 


Not Norman.

Also, at the end, you know what happens to Whatever They Call Norman? If they change that, there’s really no point.

As for Beyonce as Esther…

I mean I get it. It’s obvious. But beyond her talent, Esther is defined by her selflessness, she’s made vulnerable by her gratitude, she’s capable of loving and living outside of herself, of sacrifice for others. That brings us back to Beyonce. What parts of Beyonce would Beyonce have to access in order to get to Esther? Do those parts exist? Some of you think the elevator incident suggests that they do indeed exist. But the elevator incident – and its aftermath – might also suggest that she doesn’t allow them to exist.

Totally excited about this. Please let it happen.

Yours in gossip,