Many of you, like me, are obsessed with Celebrity Height. I am always receiving emails – how tall is x, how short is y?


Because they almost ALWAYS lie on their IMDB pages. The formula seems to be – take a couple of inches off, that’s probably about right. And the reason for this? Bitches like me, who associate male tallness with attractiveness, probably don’t help. But hey, Napoleon came well before us.

(Dear Paolo, I love you and you are The Exception. Also you wear your pants really well and have a beautiful wife and really cute children.)

While it’s no surprise why the men insist on faking out a few inches, I have never understood why the women do it. But here’s a good story about one who does.

I was with a journalist yesterday at a junket. We were standing around talking sh-t about why Sundance is such a goddamned disorganised clusterf-ck every single year. Zooey Deschanel was giving an interview just a few feet away. She isn’t short. Unlike the other actresses milling about the studio. And thus began a conversation about how little they are. The girls are so little. They have to be, I guess. Because the boys are so little. And then my acquaintance cited Jodie Foster as an example.

Jodie Foster?

How tall does Jodie Foster seem to you? In movies, she looks average, not particularly wee, obviously not giant. And she’s listed at 5 ft 3 and a half on IMDB. That’s about what I am. My acquaintance is 5 ft 4. And she once interviewed Foster on camera sitting down. At the end of the interview, she was firmly instructed to stay seated until Foster left the room…so that visually there could be no comparison. And why? Because apparently Foster is like barely 5 ft 1.

Me: stop. I don’t believe you.

Journalist: I’m telling you. She barely comes up to my chin.

Me: what?

Journalist: ask around. Everyone has a story like that.

And I did. And indeed they do. I asked several colleagues yesterday if they’d had a similar experience – not necessarily with Foster but with others – and they did. Can you imagine? Celebrities, they have to fabricate so many other things, almost everything, and they can’t even be real about how tall they are? It must be exhausting.

Anyway, here’s Jodie Foster, elegant and steezy, in Paris at the Armani Prive Menswear show.

Photos from