It’s the best sh-t ever.

Spoiler alert for Desperate Housewives although I can’t imagine you don’t know about this by now…

Marc Cherry has killed off Nicolette Sheridan/Edie Britt. I don’t watch DH, have never watched a full episode, but I know enough that Edie was the skank ho on the block and now she’s gone. Apparently she’s gone because these two queens could not co-exist.

Oh but why not???

In a new interview with TV Guide, Nicolette – bless her – refuses to sugarcoat her departure. Bitter, bitchy, and petty, she tears down the show and its creator and also compares herself to a diamond.

Nicolette says that DH now sucks: "When the show started it was such a different beast. It was exciting and dangerous and funny and edgy and bizarre. It started feeling a little complacent, and that was very frustrating. (I would have left sooner but we were all) contractually bound, so there was no way out on your own terms. "

She believes that without her, it will suck even harder: "(Killing off Edie) was a risky decision that could have devastating ramifications."

She thinks that Edie was ultimately killed because Marc is harbouring some latent emotional distress and decided to take it out on her character: “Somebody up there really wanted her dead. I think whoever Edie represented in Marc's life was somebody he didn't like. And he had a very difficult time distinguishing between fact and fiction."

Finally, she insists that her talent was wasted, that Cherry stupidly ignored the brightest star on his roster: "When you have a jewel, why not polish it and put it out there for all to see?"

Do you love it?????

I love it so much!

So how did Marc Cherry respond?


You don’t need to teach a queen how to claw.

According to Cherry, he, like many other executives in this economy, needed to downside. Cutting Nicolette was the only logical move and it will save the show up to $200,000:

“There has been tremendous pressure put on me to cut costs ... the network is saying to all the shows, 'The company is really hurting financially. You must find a way to produce these shows more cheaply.’ ”

So how will they replace her?

"Edie's already slept with most of the guys on the street and has caused about as many problems as she could. We will find a new kind of sexiness coming through Wisteria Lane. What I won't do is cast another fortysomething sexy blonde. (Nicolette) performed the aging, neighborhood tramp better than anyone has ever done before."

Oh no he didn’t.

Oh yes he did.

He used the A word. Which implies the O word.

This is Nicolette leaving My House (a club) the other night trying not to look O even though she is A.


Photos from