The point of this article was supposed to be the pants. But I decided to google him anyway just to see if there was anything else to say. This was the headline:

Robert Pattinson might be nominated for an Oscar…


They’re already putting together long lists for consideration for 2015 at The Playlist. Strong contenders with their own paragraph include Johnny Depp, Josh Brolin, Liev Schreiber, and Albert Brooks. Understandable. Then they just start throwing names at the screen. And the final name they add to the Best Supporting Actor category is Robert Pattinson for Life, the film he’s been shooting in Toronto with Dane DeHaan. Twi-Hards still generate internet traffic.

Anyway, here’s Pattinson on Saturday arriving on set. Those jeans…are terrible. Unless you want to see his mothering hips. And if that’s the case, they’re great. I used to obsess before about Jake Gyllenhaal’s pants problem too. But it’s two different bodies. The thighs, though. That’s where they Venn.  James Franco too.

We all have superficial criteria, right? Some guys like legs. Some are into the ass. Some/most would never look at me because I’m short, stubby, and a major c-nt. Me, I’m into pants. I need him to wear the sh-t out of a pair of pants. Jacek wears the sh-t out of his pants. He looks so good in jeans. The problem with Jacek is that he only wears Under Armour.