The Walking Dead Season 2 Episode 3 recap

We open with a super creepy, out of context shot of Stupid Shane shaving his head. Cut to Shane and Otis The Fat Cannibal attempting to outrun the zombies at the high school as Rick narrates a story about the time Stupid Shane stole a car. We’re supposed to understand that Shane has had close scrapes before and gotten away with it. What I understand is that Shane has been stupid his entire life.

First look at the RV survivors and Andrea is still trying to learn to break down and reassemble her gun. Carol is crying in the background. I have increasingly less and less sympathy for Carol and Sophia. Sophia, because she’s listening-challenged and caused this mess and Carol because she does nothing but bitch and moan while other people try to find her kid.

Stupid Shane to Otis The Fat Cannibal: “You’re a crazy son of a bitch, ain’t you?” Otis to Shane: “Yes, I eat people I’m just trying to do right by that boy.”

It’s a shame Shane is such a dick because he is a natural survivor and in some ways, better equipped to lead than Rick. Rick is still clinging to his humanity but Shane has grasped that the way he was living pre-zombie isn’t going to work anymore.

Glenn and T-Dog arrive at the Farm of Doom. Glenn and Maggie chat and Glenn is nervous enough to tip off his crush.

Daryl is SUCH a redneck, yet he is increasingly the most likeable character on the show, next to Officer Rick. And if Rick doesn’t get back to zombie-slaying awesomeness soon, Daryl will be the most likeable.

HORRIBLE LORI is back in full. I don’t care if it is the motherf*cking zombie apocalypse you DO NOT wish your own kid dead. I don’t even like kids and I know that’s messed up. She is seriously making Rick justify why it’s better that their kid doesn’t die. W. T. F.

I’m increasingly impressed that Rick has stayed married to Horrible Lori as long as he has. He’s, like, a marriage superhero.

Stupid Shane is still under siege at the high school. Otis The Fat Cannibal appears in the nick of time to bail him out with a zombie kill. TWD uses a lot of CGI blood and I have to say, I hate it. Three things still look stupid with CGI—water, fire and blood. There’s no “weight” to CGI blood. It doesn’t look real for one second.

Carl wakes up and has to act. Tragic for us all.

Rick undergoes yet another transfusion to save Carl. Jesus I hope they resolve this plot in this episode. There are only so many times a transfusion is exciting.

Carol suggests Dale goes down to sleep while she takes over the watch. YEAH RIGHT. At this point, she’s the most useless person in the group. Even nearly-dead Carl, half-dead Rick and fever-deluded T-Dog are more useful than Carol.

WORLD WAR Z! I’m going to take the zombie hanging out of the tree as a reference to the Bible of zombie-survival literature, in which a paratrooper is bitten while stuck in a tree due to parachute malfunction. Although, this zombie is a dude who hung himself after getting bit, not understanding he needed to blow his own brains out.

I love how Daryl calls zombies “geeks”.

Now Andrea and Daryl debate whether or not living is worth it. They keep it short, though, and move on as Daryl kills the tree-geek.

Midway point: Much more action and overall tense-ness as there is little pontificating in this episode. The theme is definitely whether or not people think it’s worth it to keep living, but no one is dwelling on the point as they’re dealing with life-threatening situations all around. Daryl continues his rise to being the most awesome person on the show. Horrible Lori sucks again.

Oh my god, Carol, why don’t you know how to shoot yet?! I’m starting to say her name like Archer says Carol/Cheryl’s name (if you don’t get that, watch Archer). Carol!

Getting back into the Glenn goodness. He was a highlight of season 1 and season 2 could use more Glenn.

Another season 1/2 discrepancy—in season 1 Morgan was terrified of zombies seeing lights from the house at night, yet the Farm of Doom is ablaze with light and no zombies.

Rick lectures Horrible Lori about having hope and finding a place to live despite the zombies and the general horrorshow nature of life. WHY IS THIS EVEN NECESSARY? Because

Zombie horde still chasing Stupid Shane and Otis The Fat Cannibal.

I hope when Carl inevitably gets better that no one tells him how his horrible mother was ready to let him die as his father nearly killed himself to keep him alive. Shane makes it back but Otis The Fat Cannibal got eaten. Irony.

Dale apologizes to Andrea for saving her and taking away her gun. Maybe now Andrea will get over herself and become awesome.

Maggie and Glenn bond over who Maggie lost to the zombies. I’m really going to like them as a unit, I can tell. Herchel saves Carl, but let’s face it—he’s just saving Carl to fatten him up for dinner.

Didn’t Otis have Rick’s big-ass revolver? What happened to it?
Horrible Lori and Stupid Shane have a moment in Carl’s room. See, producers? These moments of non-verbal communication work just as well, if not better, than elaborate debates.

We end with the scene of Shane shaving his head. Context: HE FED OTIS TO THE ZOMBIES.

Status check:
Officer Rick: Father of the year. Deserves a medal for being married to Horrible Lori.
Horrible Lori: OMG, SO HORRIBLE.
Stupid Shane: Now comes in “murdering asshole” flavor.
Otis The Fat Cannibal: Eaten by zombies.
Glenn: Totally crushing on Maggie.
Sophia: Missing. Still.
Carl: Going to live.

Worst thing seen/heard this episode: Zombies eating Otis.

Zombie kill of the week: Goes to the zombies for dining buffet-styles on Otis The Fat Cannibal.