The Walking Dead Season 3 Episode 7 recap

You guys, Merle is still REALLY upset about that whole “left handcuffed on a rooftop in Atlanta, surrounded by zombies” thing. He’s been roughing up Glenn, threatening him with his creepy knife-hand. I like that we’re getting to see the tougher side of Glenn. He’s a secret badass, although I’m with Maggie—it’s hard to listen to Glenn get beat up. It’s kind of like watching someone kick a puppy. Even if the puppy does bite back.

Rick watches Michonne dispatch a group of zombies, even though she’s badly hurt. This is one of the better auditions to join the group that we’ve seen lately.

Rick engages in some zombie-slaying of his own (this time, of the non-crazy/mental breakdown variety), and saves Michonne. She isn’t cooperative, though, and is pretty spectacularly ungrateful for the whole life-saving thing.

Daryl reunites Carol and the group. Can we press reset on her character? I’ll tolerate the weird relationship with Daryl if we can get a better, less whiny Carol 2.0 in trade.

Ugh. Andrea. And the Governor. Nightmare pairing.

Hooo boy. Michonne and Rick are already sparking. She fills them in on Woodbury and the Governor. I cannot wait for those two to go on an epic zombie-slaying tear. And maybe a regular-murder spree, too, once they get into it with the Governor.

Jebus. Merle is really working over Glenn. And adding to the pile of “things that will probably come back to get you later”, Merle’s hilariously wrong assessment of Rick’s leadership abilities is (probably) going to have severe consequences.

Too much of this brewing Prison vs. Woodbury situation relies on Andrea’s involvement/knowledge of all parties. This makes me very nervous. Because she’s terrible, obviously.

HA—I love that Luna Lovegood, probably the most useless person in the group at this point (seriously, at least Carl can shoot), volunteers to go look for Glenn and Maggie. They don’t take her, obviously. The group is off to Woodbury.

Carl wants to name the baby Judith after his third-grade teacher. Somebody had a crush.

The Governor brings Andrea to some kind of hospice setup managed by Mengele (seriously, what is that creepy doctor dude’s name?). There’s an old guy, Mr. Coleman, under Mengele’s care. I feel immensely sorry for the old guy.

His name is Milton Mumbley? What did he say?

They play a memory game with the old guy. I want to know what that’s all about, but I also don’t want to know what that’s all about. You know?
Merle is such an assh*le. He looses a zombie on Glenn, who is still tied to a chair. And yet, Glenn holds his own.

DUDE. Glenn killed the SH*T out of that zombie.

What a lovely bit of direction (courtesy Daniel Sackheim, veteran of Life, House and The X-Files) at the end of that scene, lingering on Glenn after he has his primal scream moment. Nothing emphasizes desperation and hopelessness quite like his harsh panting in the silence.

Okay, so Mengele is using old Mr. Coleman, who is dying of prostate cancer, to see how memory lingers as the mind fades. So yeah, the Governor is into some “we can cure the zombies” sh*t. Andrea’s like, no you can’t.

I love how Mengele is like, “Yeah whatever, we know better,” and Andrea is all, “Um, listen son, I’ve seen this like, a million times. You can’t fix it.” I can practically see Andrea getting a bad idea here.

Here’s a big surprise—Mengele was a shut in before the zombie apocalypse.

Ugh. Here’s another big surprise—the Governor prefers to talk to Maggie himself. Because he’s a creepy creeper. Undoubtedly, he thinks he’s some kind of ladies’ man.

And of course the Governor makes Maggie strip. He’s such a f*cking creep. But damn if this scene isn’t a thousand times scarier than a zombie attack. The threat of sexual violence >>>> zombies.

Given Rick and Daryl’s new dynamic, I can’t wait to see how Daryl copes with Merle’s return. But first they have to get past this zombie horde. The group ends up taking refuge in an old cabin, where they find a crazy dude hiding. I would really like to know why this dude doesn’t seem to get the bit about the zombie threat, but Michonne kills him first. Well, at least his body makes good zombie bait.

Zombie buffet. Ew.

Back to the creepy memory test on the newly-zombified Mr. Coleman, which of course doesn’t work because ZOMBIE, DUH. Andrea kills it before it can bite Mengele.

Goddammit, Maggie. She gives up the group to save Glenn. Which is romantic and all, but SERIOUSLY, GIRL.

Well at least the Governor grasps that Rick et al are not to be taken lightly. Merle pledges his allegiance to Woodbury and the Governor sends a group to scout the prison. We end on a downbeat, with Andrea taking comfort from the Governor. (GROSS.) It’s just the calm before the storm, though. Next week is the mid-season finale with Rick’s group finally going toe-to-toe with Woodbury.

Status Check:
Officer Rick – Has his head back in the game.
Michonne – Probationary prison group member.
The Governor – Psycho creep from hell (aka Andrea’s perfect man).
Andrea – Just. Ugh.
Glenn – A F*CKING BOSS.
Maggie – Well she tried, I suppose.

Worst thing seen/heard this episode: The zombie buffet. Always.

Zombie kill of the week: Glenn with the chair bits to the eyes.

Photos courtesy AMC