The male Avengers all showed for The Avengers premiere last night. I’ll need some nerd help on the following: is Nick Fury considered an Avenger? I was picking all the pictures and excluded Tom Hiddleston because he doesn’t qualify as Loki’s a bad guy but how about Sam Jackson? (Easy you horny Hiddleston fans. I’ll have a lot more Hiddleston for you after the weekend. And not just pictures either. Look out for it.)

As mentioned earlier, first reviews for The Avengers are largely positive. Some verge on the orgasmic.

So here they are, the men of The Avengers:

Robert Downey Jr, with his wife Susan, having just celebrated the birth of their son, meticulously manicured in a purple suit, very much part of the Hollywood Establishment now. This is the face of two mega mega franchises with two major studios. I feel like this is something we don’t acknowledge enough. That RDJ has managed to redefine his celebrity identity. And for those of you who’ve been consumed with this sort of thing lately, would he actually risk that by sh-t talking? And how would that fit into his new list of priorities?

What will the combined box office of the Hemsworth brothers be in two years? Maybe this should be a discussion some time: Celebrity Brothers-Off featuring the Afflecks, Wilsons, Hemsworths, Coens, Wahlbergs, Jolie-Pitts, and I know I’m missing a few more but you see my point.

Second time this week that I’m down with what Chris Evans is wearing and how he’s wearing it. Such an improvement over this.

Jeremy Renner picked the worst suit of the lot, I think. But I’d be afraid to tell him because he’ll f-ck you up, motherf-cker. Jeremy Renner will f-ck you up.

And finally, the best of them all...

Mark Ruffalo.

He is the answer, always, to the question: Who do you love?

I love Mark Ruffalo so much.