Dear Gossips,   

It’s been one of the most viral moments of the year – when Astronomer’s former CEO, Andy Byron, was busted cheating on his wife with the head of HR, Kristin Cabot, on the jumbotron at the Coldplay show in Boston. Since then, both have resigned from their posts with the company and there are rumours that Andy Byron is considering suing the band, although worth noting that this hasn’t been confirmed by reliable outlets. I don’t buy it, but then again, it probably would surprise no one if this privileged white man felt he was owed his life back for a poor decision he made. 

 

Astronomer, meanwhile, is shifting the narrative. This is a successful company, valued at over a billion dollars, but was not necessarily widely known to the public… until, of course, the duck and hide seen around the world. Why not capitalise on the notoriety – as they say, turn lemons into lemonade, by stirring in some goop. 

 

The spot with Gwyneth Paltrow is brilliant marketing, in several ways. First, of course, Gwyneth was married to Chris Martin, there’s an immediate association here. She’s an Oscar-winning actress, she knows how to deliver a line with a wink. Also, Gwyneth understands scandal and controversy, she’s been through decades of it. And the timing could not be better, with the imminent release of Amy Odell’s biography. And one more thing – on appearance, Gwyneth is ostensibly who Kristin Cabot would point to as style inspiration: pale skin, blue eyes, fried blonde hair, willowy frame. 

 

No notes, it’s perfect, right down to the bland backdrop, Gwyneth’s unremarkable wardrobe, and seemingly unwashed hair. They did not throw the budget at this, probably because they had to pay her – just to come in from the garden, quickly wash her hands, and say a few words to camera. The easiest money she’s ever made. She puts more effort into the #boyfriendbreakfasts she posts on Instagram. Gwyneth Paltrow wins again. 

And also, so do Ryan Reynolds and Maximum Effort. Because that’s who produced the spot, which bears their irreverent signature. 

 

Unless you’re a Justin Baldoni fan, it’s impossible not to appreciate the ingenuity here. 

Yours in gossip,

Lainey 

Photo credits: X/ Astronomer

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