After spending a few days away to celebrate her birthday, Ana de Armas and Ben Affleck are back in LA and back to their dog walks in Venice. It looks like Ben’s had a haircut, right? Did Ana cut his hair? I can picture it. I mean, probably I shouldn’t picture it, but I think she could do it. I’d wager that his hair is her work. You? 

But I also have some other questions. Dog questions. Did their dogs make the trip with them? It was probably a road trip, right? Going from the pictures, it looked like it would be a good place to take the dogs – lots of open space, possibly hiking, probably ample opportunity for off-leash time. I have other dog-related questions where Ben and Ana are concerned. Like, how did his dog react to the fact that another dog was just, like, moving in? 


Dogs can be territorial, and even the ones that aren’t territorial don’t love having their space invaded. Barney was five when we brought Elvis home four years ago, and looking back, we probably didn’t handle their introduction very well. Jacek flew to Alberta to pick up Elvis – he was only 12 weeks at the time and we really couldn’t handle the idea of him being alone in a plane by himself. So Barney and I went to the airport to get them when they landed. I pulled up curbside, Barney could see that Jacek was approaching the car with a puppy in his arms, and Barney immediately jumped into the front seat (he hates the front seat) and was so disgusted and betrayed by “dad” holding some strange dog that he refused to acknowledge him all the way home. It didn’t help that Elvis shat himself in the backseat like three times on the ride. Barney and Elvis are loving brothers now but it took a while for Barney to get over that breach of trust. And in retrospect, we know now that it should have been better managed. That, ideally, they should have met on neutral territory. And if that wasn’t possible, we at least shouldn’t have gone to the airport to pick them up. We should have waited at home, in the yard, and let them sniff each other out first. 

Anyway, all this to say that my nosy ass is wondering, now that Ben and Ana are clearly living together, how they rolled it all for their dogs. And how long it took Ben’s dog to figure out that Ana’s dog (also called Elvis) wasn’t leaving. I remember, for at least a couple of weeks after our Elvis came home, and he’d be doing his puppy thing, all annoying and sh-t, Barney would look up at me like… I hate him, when are you kicking him out? Barney is very dramatic, he takes after me.