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Can f-ck.

He came to our building yesterday in Toronto for an interview with Much. I’m in Vancouver. Balls! Always miss the good ones!

My colleagues however provided the play-by-play.

First of all, he has a university degree. In English. Please. My zipper’s half way down. And he’s articulate. And the girls say he’s not short. And the hair...

The hair speaks Spanish and cooks French in the kitchen.

Apparently the hair is a million times Patrick Dempsey.

Did I mention he’s educated?

Yeah.

All that, and then when he looks at you it’s over. OVER.

Not smarmy, not skeezy, it’s not like he’s undressing you, but he’s telling you he’d really like to, if you wouldn’t mind. In proper sentences.

A master eye-f-cker the girls said.

A level of eyef-ckery they’ve rarely seen in a celebrity.

Anyway, he also stopped by to see George at The Hour. Oh my God the way he sits on that couch. Click here to watch.

But...

With me there’s always a but...

Am such a picky skank bitch...

But...

Maybe the pants are too tight?

Still, undeniably, it’s time for Bradley Cooper.

Can’t wait to see The Hangover.


Photos from John Kennedy/Splashnewsonline.com

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