Well, this is a day. Today, we’re going to try to be the distraction that we are looking for. Let’s start with Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello’s new family member, Tarzan. Some people still don’t believe these two are legit but I have to say, the dog adds a lot of legitimacy to their relationship. That is a serious commitment. 

 

The Holidate is not going to save us from anything (it’s bad) but Rachel Handler at Vulture watched The Holidate, Emily in Paris, and The Princess Switch and came up with an intriguing theory: Netflix hates Chicago. This cracked me up. I’ve only been once but I loved Chicago and Sarah lives there, so it also has that going for it. 

Last night, I made a concerted effort to go down a Succession rabbit hole. This led me to Keeley Hawes’s Instagram because she’s married to Matthew McFayden. I’m a dumbass and didn’t know this! I now love and am now obsessed with them. And their dog. 

 

Another goodie is Helena Bonham Carter in The Guardian– and this is dishy. She chose to do it at the journalist’s home (a rarity) and showed up ready to chat about her wardrobe, Tim Burton, side-by-side marital homes, sex pests, and period dramas. She calls her time with Kenneth Branagh “blood under the bridge,” a phrase Emma Thompson also used to describe the affair (she was married to Kenneth at the time). It’s juicy and irreverent, the kind of candid celebrity interview we rarely get these days. 

OK I love a Hollywood Sliding Doors story (a term Lainey coined years ago), like Nicole Kidman dropping out of Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Angelina Jolie taking the role. This is one I did not see coming: the role of Aldous Snow in Forgetting Sarah Marshall was written for Charlie Hunnam?! He and Jason Segel are good friends (they worked together on Undeclared) and Charlie did the table read but, even though the part was written for him, he declined to do the movie because he didn’t think it aligned with his career goals. This was not well received by the producing team but he stood firm, “’Listen, it’s nothing personal. I’m just following my North Star. I’m just in a weird spot and I’m trying to define for myself what the path forward is.’” How is a struggling actor turning down a Judd Apatow movie? That takes a strong stomach, but it also totally sounds Charlie Hunnam. It was probably why he was later able to drop out of 50 Shades of Grey, a loss for us, but a smart move for him. And he wasn’t wrong: Russell Brand is insufferable but he was perfect for that part. 

Chrissy Teigen is back on social media, which is lovely to see. I also want to shout out the cord, which is doing the most in this photo. No matter how rich a person is, no matter how big their mansion, no matter what kind of custom furniture is built just for them, they need that cord and it’s bulky. It’s awkward. Somewhere, Jeff Bezos is in his lair made out of titanium or whatever, on his hands and knees looking for somewhere to plug in a cord just like this. It’s an equalizer.