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To Posh and her new extensions.

A helpless David Beckham watched on the sideline as his team was defeated by the Germans yesterday in South Africa. There was a disallowed goal that was so f-cking a goal. And that totally changed the dynamic of the game. And it made Becks so sad. He was so sad and so forlorn sitting there in his well tailored suit and his great hair and his hot hotness, of course I wanted to comfort him. You all wanted to comfort him. But no one else gets to comfort him. Because he will seek comfort against the bones of his wife.

Victoria and the children are waiting for David in the South of France where they have a home. She arrived there the other day, announcing her presence in yellow, with a new weave. How cute is Romeo that he still needs his comfort toy? It’s been a long time since the boys have seen their father. A reunion is imminent. Good. I could use some Beckham Porn. And they could use some Beckham Porn to kill those dumbass rumours of a split.


Photos from Wenn.com and Splashnewsonline.com and ZUMApress.com/Keystone Press

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