On Valentine’s Day, approximately four hundred years ago now, Hulu dropped a teaser for Adrian Lyne’s new erotic thriller, Deep Water. This is, of course, the project that birthed BenAna, as stars Ben Affleck and Ana de Armas became a real-life couple after working together. When the teaser dropped, Lainey wondered how they, now famous exes, would promote the film together. The answer seems to be: they won’t.


Deep Water drops NEXT WEEK. We should be hip-deep in the promotion cycle for this film, but it is CRICKETS out here. And sure, it’s a straight-to-Hulu endeavor, but this is still a movie that stars two very famous people, streaming or not, it’s going to attract attention. But BenAna don’t seem to be doing anything to support the film which I can understand from an awkwardness angle, but this is ADRIAN LYNE. Do NOT disrespect the modern master of English-language eroticism, NOT IN MY HOUSE. 

It's a shame Deep Water is getting deep shafted, because it looks pretty good. Ana de Armas is WILDLY sexy, like OUT OF CONTROL hot, like bitch face bitch bod WORK IT HOT, and Ben Affleck is also present. They’re a couple, a pair of old marrieds, with a kid and everything, but their vibe is really “My husband cleans my shoes with his tongue and HE IS GRATEFUL”. Big Eyes Wide Shut vibes here, is what I’m saying. But instead of a weird rich people sex cult, the “game” is a couple that incorporates adultery into their intimate relationship and Ben Affleck’s friends are like, “But dude, WHY is your wife such a HO?” and he’s like, “I don’t know, it’s a big-time mystery, my guys,” all while smiling to himself because he likes it when she cheats. He’s a cuckold! Some people get off on it! It’s not a mystery. But his friends can’t understand his extremely hot wife banging whoever she wants because she is extremely hot and can bang whoever she wants. Also, there is a Suspicious Death In The Pool. This movie looks f-cking rad, and it sucks that no one is supporting it except for the social media team at Hulu and Ana de Armas stans.