Harry Styles covers the new issue of Rolling Stone. It’ll be his second solo Rolling Stone cover – the last time was for the May 2017 issue which was around the time he was promoting his first solo album and its lead single, Sign of the Times, which I will now and forever associate with Love Island because they played it during one of the final episodes and Jacek was so into it (the show, I mean) and so moved by how the song worked in the scene that he added it to his library and texted me, “Christ, this show is f-cking me up, I just had to download a Harry Styles song”, LOL. 

Anyway, here’s Harry:

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Rolling Stone (@rollingstone) on

There are no other details about the profile other than when it hits newsstands but, giving the timing, fans are thinking that, like last time, he’s coming out with new music soon, otherwise what’s the point? Some fans are wondering if it’s going to be as soon as Friday. It would be amazing if it’s Friday, because Friday marks the release of Taylor Swift’s Lover. I don’t think it’s going to be Friday. I don’t think Harry wants to be associated with that drama anymore. 

Still, in the absence of any other details beyond the cover and the cover line – intriguing as it is with the “sex, psychedelics, and the secrets of stardom” – the only thing for people to talk about are his armpits and his nipples. I never thought I would appreciate Harry Styles’s armpits but I actually do. They’re lightly haired. This should be the amount of armpit hair standard for men. Can we move on to The Little Mermaid

It was reported last week first that Harry had been cast as Prince Eric in the live action adaptation and then, shortly after, there was clarification that Harry actually respectfully declined the role. Some were very disappointed by this decision but how realistic was it to begin with? 

He’s on the cover of Rolling Stone talking about “sex and psychedelics”. That’s not actually on brand with Disney’s Little Mermaid. We, unfortunately, do not yet live in a world where people would be OK with Prince Eric out here smoking weed and getting strange while promoting a wholesome tale from under the sea. I’m not sure that’s even in line for how Harry sees himself. This is the guy who hasn’t stopped cosplaying Keith Richards since he left One Direction. And there aren’t very many people in that lane. 

Most mainstream solo male pop acts these days are either R&B inspired or wedding song inspired: Bruno Mars, Ed Sheeran, Shawn Mendes, Zayn Malik, The Weeknd. Harry’s the only one fronting like he’s a “rocker”. It’s worked for him so far. I don’t know how Prince Eric would meet that strategy, being that “Disney Prince” and “boy bander” kind of belong in the same family; they’re basically cousins. Harry’s whole sh-t is to get as far away from that DNA as he can. So, again, was Prince Eric ever a reality, as much as he’s trying to work on his acting? 

I can understand why he was interested in playing Elvis Presley, since that would have required a certain flex of whatever acting ability he has and that movie, obviously, would have put him at the center of the story. The Little Mermaid, however, is Ariel’s story – and right now, Harry is presumably looking for his own spotlight. 

For now, then, the spotlight will be on his music. He’s been seen in recent weeks shooting what’s expected to be footage from two new music videos. So something, for sure, is coming soon. I wonder if that means he’ll be making an appearance at the VMAs on Monday.