Jake Gyllenhaal’s Road House will premiere on Prime Video on Thursday. Early reviews came out very strong and have since levelled off, Sarah’s review will be posted later this week and, spoiler alert, which she’s already hinted at, she will be eating sh-t. Because she’d been doubting this project from the moment they announced it, all the way through the trailer releases. Now that she’s seen it, well, she’ll have to tell herself about herself, lol. Sarah hasn’t filed her piece yet but I cannot wait to read it!


In the meantime, Jake’s been doing all kinds of promotion for the film and he was on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon last night being all kinds of charming, and looking all kinds of delicious, and this is my version of Sarah eating sh-t because Jake is not my favourite. I mean, he was my favourite, until he was a dick to me in an interview, but I also, through my disdain, appreciate his performances, both as an actor and as a celebrity. When Jake turns it on, he can crank it way up. Which is what he brought to Fallon during the interview and then later when they were playing the singing whisper game – I’ve embedded both videos below. 


What bites my ass about disliking Jake on a personal level is how much I enjoy him on a professional level: Jake Gyllenhaal has so much range. He can bro down in Southpaw and Road House but is equally effective in offbeat disturbing films, like Nightcrawler and Donnie Darko. He’s a swoony romantic lead, like in Love and Other Drugs and also Brokeback Mountain and he can turn goofy on a dime, which we saw in Spider-Man: Far From Home. Also, Jake can play live. 


It was announced earlier this month that he will be back on Broadway opposite none other than Denzel Washington in a new staging of Othello. Denzel is Othello and Jake is Iago, arguably Shakespeare’s ultimate villain. This is perfect casting – Denzel, obviously, but Jake Gyllenhaal as Iago? It’s thrilling. Because I’ve actually seen it up close, haha. I’ve seen his eyes turn mean with mischief, and that’s exactly Iago: cruel but comedic, manipulative, smart and irreverent, amoral but irresistible. He had to be this mass of contradictions to capture Othello’s trust so completely. Jake Gyllenhaal is fully capable of playing this level of deceit, night after night. This is range – and it’s why I can never get on board with all the dicksucking that happens with Leonardo DiCaprio. Not when Jake Gyllenhaal is right there, flexing all that range, when Leo, really, is limited to one medium.


From Iago though, will Jake go Batman? He was asked by Screenrant about all the DC fans who want him to be cast as the next Bruce Wayne, especially since he once auditioned for the role that eventually went to Christian Bale. Jake basically said that he’d be open to it, that it would be an “honour”. I would ask Sarah her opinion on this but I don’t want to interrupt her while she’s, um, humbly working on her Road House review.