The thrill I experience when I get a new ON THE JLO in my inbox!

ON THE JLO (which, if you don’t know, is Jennifer Lopez’s community newsletter – and where have you been???) is like JLo’s own TMZ! She’s creating her own gossip universe!


Last night, a brand new edition of ON THE JLO, in which she tells subscribers “how it went down”. That’s the actual title of the message, she is nothing if not direct. I have never opened an email so fast. 

Ben Affleck proposed to JLo while she was in the bath. You’ll recall, in Newsletter #2, she posted a video of herself taking a bath that he filmed. The Bennifer bath is the new ass caress, it’s their signature move now. And you have to give her your email address to be able to see it. And a much better shot of her engagement ring. 


So, yes, I know, blah blah blah bitch bitch, Bennifer is so performative, they stage everything etc etc etc. But also…what do you make of the fact that her nails weren’t all that done, LOL? They’re not janky or anything but they’re not exactly “show off my manicure” energy either. 

Does that suggest the proposal was more spontaneous? Or did she deliberately plain-up her nails so that the gorgeous green diamond would be better showcased? 

I don’t give a sh-t what the answer is. I love it all. Everything she is giving us right now is excellent. And there’s no stopping! Because today she dropped this:


It wasn’t a secret that she’d been working on her own documentary – it just wasn’t known exactly when it would be ready. And now JLo’s Halftime is opening the Tribeca Festival. Which makes sense because, well, she’s Jenny From the Block, she’s taking her doc home to New York. 

The film isn’t literal, like we’re not looking at a documentary about her Super Bowl halftime show, which will be a part of it, I’m sure, but the story is more than just one performance, it’s about her life, her career so… you know all that speculation last year, when Bennifer first got back together, and people where theorising that they were “recreating iconic moments from their relationship” for a new video? 

Maybe we’ll finally be able to see some of that footage. Unless, of course, from now on, she keeps that kind of footage “ON THE JLO”. Who are we kidding? Someone like JLo has more than enough footage of herself, and her personal life, and Ben to go both ON THE JLO and in this documentary, which is part of her Netflix deal. How about that for great timing? Will Bennifer be married by the time of the premiere? 

PS. they were seen yesterday looking at more properties, including the famed Aaron Spelling estate with a price tag of $165 million.