Alpha Wolf Leonardo DiCaprio was photographed yesterday with two of his Beta Wolves, Kevin Connolly and Lukas Haas leaving a children’s production of Beauty And The Beast. They were presumably there because the kids of Tobey Maguire, Beta Plus Wolf, were performing. So they were on Uncle duty. At this point in the post I’m supposed to say that’s so nice, different from the usual pussy-hunting wolf outing that we usually associate with this crew. Sure. But can I also point out that the women Leo dates – and not “usually” dates, or “typically” dates, but “ALWAYS” dates – are closer in age to the participants in the production? Or is that offside? I wonder if he was grossed out by all the moms who were there. Gwyneth Paltrow was there too. Gwyneth is friends with Jennifer Meyer, so it’s not like their circles never intersect. Do you think G has ever tried to matchmake for Leo? Or does she not bother because there’s really no art in it. There’s not much finesse in showing someone a catalogue.

The last time I posted about Leo it was in Cannes, fresh off his breakup with Nina Agdal, making his annual trip to the South of France because he cares about film and philanthropy – and not at all about all the models who migrate to Cannes for 10 days during the festival. He kept a relatively low profile, perhaps aware of what everyone was assuming he was doing there and maybe even trying to be sensitive to Nina considering their split had just happened. Leo will be back in the South of France in July for his annual Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation Gala. Lots and lots and lots of models were there last year. Models encourage millionaires and billionaires to donate, like a dick-off with your wallet. If you or anyone you know has the means to attend, click here for tickets. I LOVE the part at the end that breaks down where you will be seated according to how much money you’ve paid.