Jennifer Lopez Mama Lo…Too Much Glow I know it’s the politically correct thing to say – when a new mother steps out, of course the compliments are supposed to follow. She looks amazing, her body looks amazing, amazing amazingness all over the place! So I understand as I write this that I am inviting your wrath. By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:43 am
Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone Madonna’s Achilles Heel At first glance it sounds like a bullsh*t story – Madonna wants to remake Casablanca – particularly because it’s coming from the UK. But then again… for all her brilliance when it comes to music making, as entertaining as she is on stage – dancing and singing – and as incomparable as By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:35 am
Brad Pitt Tabloid Wars : The Pitt Wedding The source was Star Magazine – the always, always reliable Star Magazine. The same magazine that slaps a Brad Pitt Angelina Jolie break up story on their cover every other week. Star Magazine broke the news on Saturday that the Pitts had wed in New Orleans. The internets went wild, the By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:23 am
Douchebags What Happens in Vegas is a Busted Face Big fan of Cam these days, especially post-Pip, but this new movie What Happens in Vegas, it’s doing nothing for her. Nothing. Seriously. Watch the trailer. Ashton Kutcher looks f*cking hot. Cam absolutely not. As in her face is totally busted. Not unlike the way it was on By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:17 am
Gorgessity America Gorgessity Not crazy about the prom dress, or the shoes for that matter, but it really is no matter because with a face this warm and lovely, and sweet brown eyes that actually have a brain behind them, and full healthy locks that are NOT her best quality (because, as mentioned, By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:13 am
Music B Who? This is what happens when Tina Knowles DOESN’T dress you. Rihanna! Rihanna would totally sit atop the girl crush list if not for gay math. Because Rihanna is only 20. As far as styling is concerned though, Rihanna is killing it. Killing. It. Pretty, boring dresses can come later. By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:10 am
Shoes The Generic Simpson Not that Ashlee Simpson isn’t pretty. Because she is. Really pretty. But also pretty ordinary. Particularly because of the ordinary nose. Everyone orders this nose. It’s the most popular nose on the menu. A nose that has rendered her face kinda like every other face. Just ask Ashley By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 02:06 am
Hayden Panettiere A Veteran at 18 She might be headed for rough waters, but right now Miley Cyrus can still totally pass for teen. Hayden Panettiere on the other hand hasn’t looked like a teen in two years. Which is totally cool for a 30 year old…only Hayden isn’t a 30 year old By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 01:58 am
Parent Pimps History Repeats Itself Once upon a time, not too long ago, a longhaired pretty teen became the toast of the town, with a hit movie, a recording contract, and a too blonde, too orange mother-manager overseeing her career. Pretty soon she was living at the Chateau Marmont, dating boys much much older, had By Lainey • Mar 31, 2008 01:52 am
Katie Holmes RoboBride to Broadway? Katie Holmes is supposedly in talks to perform on Broadway – in Arthur Miller All My Son’s. Click here for more about the production. Katie’s role is not planned to be controversial. On the contrary, she would play a woman in love with a man a soldier who has By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 06:36 am
Victoria Beckham Sweet Valley Smaller You remember Jessica and Elizabeth Wakefield, don’t you? Francine Pascal’s Sweet Valley High is being reissued by Random House to capitalise on the current generation of Gossip Girl/The Hills obsessed tweens…with one small, teeny tiny difference: in the original series, the twins were “perfect size 6’ By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 06:01 am
Douchebags Please. Shut. Your. Ass. Well… at the very least, it’s an admission that he really does google himself. Obsessively. John Mayer – again taking to his blog with a long winded manifesto about… Fame? Vanity? Narcissism? Aspiring to more? Finding meaning in life? Sure. That’s what he says it’s about. But at By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 05:40 am
Paris Hilton Ebola’s Safe Spot Am sure you’ve all seen it – this clip of a rhythmically impaired Hollywood Ebola Paris Hilton trying to belly dance on Turkish television – as is the case whenever she attempts to groove, Paris is found to be seriously lacking. Because diseases don’t dance. What they do however is By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 04:40 am
Kate Hudson Make Another Movie After a couple weeks of bliss with Owen Wilson in Miami, Kate Hudson is back to work in New York shooting Bride Wars with Anne Hathaway. Something about best friends settling on the same wedding date, quickly becoming adversaries, ripping each other to pieces in the process. Lame. F*cking. By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 04:13 am
Hook Ups Wishful Gossip It would indeed be perfect… but unfortunately probably full of sh*t. Page Six is reporting that Jennifer Aniston and Three Whiskers Orly Bloom found themselves at Eva Longoria’s restaurant opening the other night talking very closely as Jen suggestively looked at him with her best bedroom eyes…never By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 03:47 am
Parent Pimps Get Out of Mommy’s Shot Young people at a community centre in Harlem yesterday were exploited by Dina Lohan when she dropped in with cameras to shoot a segment featuring the child she’s currently pimping – Ali Lohan. A reminder: Ali Lohan is 14. As you can see, there is nothing 14 about this child. By Lainey • Mar 28, 2008 03:43 am
