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A Bitch to Work For

Successful multi-hyphenate, super well connected personally and professionally with a reputation for being kind and compassionate and evolved. Wrong. Maybe for the media and maybe her fashionable celebrity friends, maybe for investors, maybe for executives, but some of her employees would vehemently disagree. Turns out she’s a little
By Lainey • Apr 22, 2008 03:30 am
Rossum at the Opera
Famewhores

Rossum at the Opera

Of course she was there. How could she miss it? Remember, Rossum is a carpet whore.  In all fairness, Emmy was very pretty last night at the Opera Opening in New York. Smoky eyes look good on her. But for constant sugar raping, she really is an attractive girl. But
By Lainey • Apr 22, 2008 02:56 am
Crazy at the Opera
Naomi Campbell

Crazy at the Opera

Naomi Campbell showed up at the opera last night and while she kept her crazy in check, the girl did look rough. Rough for Naomi, that is. Not rough compared to us, but rough for a supermodel. The suit was awkward, the pants were ill-fitting, the weave was budget,
By Lainey • Apr 22, 2008 02:43 am
Lilo Territorial
Clown

Lilo Territorial

Easy girl… Obviously relapse makes a girl nasty. And aggressive. And overprotective of her p&ssy! Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson have been inseparable for weeks. Lilo has been following Samantha from LA to NYC on dj gigs and word is, when Ashley Olsen stopped by to say hello
By Lainey • Apr 22, 2008 02:22 am
Happiest Couple Alive
Patrick Dempsey

Happiest Couple Alive

I know it’s only Monday and we usually play the Photo Assumption Game on Fridays but this one was too good to pass up. It’s Patrick Dempsey and his wife, Scowlface, at a screening of Made of Honour today in London. They look thrilled, non? Like… totally so
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 11:39 am
Young Boys Like Wonky Tits
Whitney Houston

Young Boys Like Wonky Tits

LOVE that Whitney is Bobby-free. LOVE that she is getting her younger man fix. Am all over the younger man fix. Within legal limits of course. As for the Gay Math limits… well Ray J comes in two years underneath the threshold. Whitney clearly cares not for Gay Math.
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 07:36 am
It’s the Hand
Parent Pimps

It’s the Hand

Many of you have emailed today about this, especially on the heels of Taylor Momsen’s revealing pose on the cover of New York Magazine. Duey emailed me last night, procrastinating as usual, with a message as follows: The apocalypse. I feel sorry for Miley Cyrus. Of course I was
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 07:17 am
Head to Toe Gwyneth
Gwyneth Paltrow

Head to Toe Gwyneth

My Gwyneth in Paris today starting promotion for Iron Man clad head to toe in designer apparel that was probably packaged and delivered wrapped in a bow right to her doorstep. No charge. Remember, my girl is on a list of very, very few privy to Nicolas Ghesquière’s newest
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 06:49 am
Please Take Her Picture!
Clown

Please Take Her Picture!

Perhaps second to only Heather Mills, not many women are as universally despised as Denise Richards, which is why it’s baffling that any network would give her her own reality tv show. A show in which she will gratuitously pimp her children so as to more effectively fellate the
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 04:37 am
Thoughts on 14?
Taylor Momsen

Thoughts on 14?

I’m mad at Colby P but he brings up a very interesting discussion point: That white hot naughty Gossip Girl cover for New York Magazine – you will note, Taylor Momsen who plays little Jenny is stripped down and full of temptation. But she’s only 14. She was born
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 04:12 am
Gold, Old, and Shady
Xenu

Gold, Old, and Shady

As mentioned earlier, Tom and Katie were on hand for the Beckhams birthday party last night in Santa Monica. Which means that, again, In Touch Weekly is, as usual, full of ass. Katie is NOT leaving him. Maybe that’s why she looks like sh*t. That gold dress on
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 03:54 am
Ed for Earth Day
Edward Norton

Ed for Earth Day

Earth Day is tomorrow and yesterday in Washington, at a rally at the National Mall, Edward Norton delivered a speech about going green looking hotter than he has in a long time. Yum. Green seems to be his favourite colour these days. Ed wrote the screenplay for and starred in
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 02:56 am
Sean and Kim: back on!
Hook Ups

Sean and Kim: back on!

Last night at the Beckham dinner, among the celebrity guests – Sean Diddy Combs and Kim Porter, who broke up last year allegedly over his infidelities, quite obviously now back together. Apparently Diddy has promised to be faithful. And Kim has promised to believe him. I can’t say that I
By Lainey • Apr 21, 2008 02:23 am
All of Posh’s BFFs
BFFs

All of Posh’s BFFs

Big night last night as many stars capitalised on the photo opp and showed up for Victoria and David’s joint birthday party. Most notable of course… Tom and Katie. Which means the BFFs have made up. Obviously Tom Cruise has come to terms with Posh’s thin-fluence on
By Lainey • Apr 20, 2008 09:41 pm
The Blair Bitch is Back
Gossip Girl

The Blair Bitch is Back

Are you ready? Tonight marks the return of Gossip Girl. Am 34. Am pathetic. Can’t.F&cking.Wait. But the good news is … Gossip Girl is not Twilight. Well... in one way, it might be like Twilight. Because Twilight the movie will artistically be undoubtedly better than the
By Lainey • Apr 20, 2008 09:34 pm
Madge Pities the Midge
Xenu

Madge Pities the Midge

Only Madonna. Only Madonna could attack Tom’s virility under the guise of sympathy.  Madge gave an interview to New York Magazine and defended Tom Cruise’s scientological fanaticism by comparing him to starving orphans in Africa:  "He is a good person. I think he gets a raw deal,
By Lainey • Apr 20, 2008 09:29 pm
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