Prince Harry actually doesn’t know her

It’s been almost two weeks since Just Andrew and Buckingham Palace announced that he can keep his titles but has agreed not to use them which… is that kinda like owning a car but promising not to drive it? You still own the f-cking car – it’s the most meaningless gesture from an institution that attaches value to increasingly meaningless symbols. 

Anyway, this weak ass decision has not had the intended effect that the British royals were hoping because the Just Andrew controversy remains a preoccupation with the British public and the media and also the government. Per the Guardian:

“Politicians are demanding clarity over Prince Andrew’s “peppercorn” rent at Royal Lodge, as the parliamentary spending watchdog writes to the Treasury and crown estate asking for an explanation.

Keir Starmer had indicated that he was open to MPs questioning Andrew in person about his home in Windsor Great Park, where he has lived for more than 20 years.

Now, the public accounts select committee (PAC), chaired by veteran Conservative MP Geoffrey Clifton-Brown, has asked the Treasury and the crown estate to provide details on the 30-room property’s lease and explain the rationale behind it by 28 November.”

The issue, basically, is whether taxpayers had been funding this loser’s living arrangements while he was allegedly participating in sex trafficking with his friend, the convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein, and his convicted accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell. 

Surprisingly even the British tabloids are staying on the story – because of course the Just Andrew scandal is giving them traffic – but we all know they’d prefer to be able to focus on their favourite targets, Prince Harry and Meghan Sussex. And even though he’s not officially a senior royal anymore, Harry keeps doing them a solid. First, earlier this week, he and Meghan were at the World Series, where there’s been all kinds of distraction over what team they should have been rooting for. And I know most of it has been said in jest, there are actually haters who are trying to make this a thing, totally telling on themselves that they’re not really here for the baseball. 

Because anyone who knows anything about the 2025 Toronto Blue Jays would understand that their team identity in this World Series is decidedly not glamorous. One of the reasons for the Jays’ appeal right now is that they are kinda misfits. One of them keeps couch-surfing at his teammate’s place. Another has been living out of his car, LOL. These are the storylines that are popping off the most for those of us who are supporting the team, the decidedly UN-sophisticated (by conventional definition) vibe of a core group of our players whose most exciting fashion moments have often been wearing t-shirts of each other’s faces. 

My point is… it’s not that we’re putting energy into not caring about whether or not the Sussexes are riding for the Jays, it’s that the Jays themselves are our celebrities and our royals right now. And their love and support of each other (they love each other SO MUCH!) is the drug that we’ve been high on. 

So that was two days ago, and then Prince Harry showed up on Hasan Minhaj’s podcast. Harry was there to raise awareness about the relationship between Big Tech and child development. What’s going viral is his American accent…

…and what his thoughts on the beef between Taylor Swift and Charli XCX are. For Hasan, I like this as a comedy bit and dropping this into the interview for kicks but also for clicks. Obviously he got the response he wanted. For Harry, even though this wasn’t calculated, it was exactly the right reaction. He clearly has no f-cking idea about what Hasan is asking him. And you can see it all over his face – which is funny! Prince Harry probably should *not* know in any detail about the beef between two popstars that has been consuming two fandoms on social media. Also, in the unlikely event that he did know about the beef, there’s already enough smoke that follows Harry around – he doesn’t need any more of it.

But this is also insightful in a more useful way about Harry and the series of mental checklist items he goes through in these environments. It’s so clear to read on his face – at first it’s super concentration, to try and understand WTF Hasan is talking about. Then, at least to me, there’s some concern and worry: am I being punked here? Is this a trap? That’s a conditioned response, obviously, given what he and Meghan have been through. At one point he looks over to what is probably a publicist or a manager, not necessarily for protection but reassurance. Is this OK? Am I hallucinating? And then there seems to be some irritation that sets in, once he realises that Hasan has turned this into a bit. Finally, he’s visibly looking like he’s trying to fix his face to remain neutral because he finally picks up on the motivation behind the question and does not want to give up any unnecessary physical clues that might give him away or inflame whatever mess might ensue. This is how Harry moves through the world, at least in these situations. 

 

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