Reality Recap: Privilege, Discussions, London

This week, we witnessed one of the best (read: chaotic) group meals over in Potomac. Teddi Mellencamp filed for divorce from Edwin Arroyave, her (hot, but in a creepy vampire kinda way) estranged husband. Monica Garcia was ordered to run Heather Gay’s Beauty Lab some serious coin after bailing on her lip injection payments. And Mia and her little boyfriend are out here making a lot of people sick with all that bumping and grinding. Put it away!

Heather Dubrow shows us her privilege

The first episode of a multi-part reunion for the cast of Real Housewives of Orange County aired last night and while it wasn’t nearly as explosive as I anticipated, it still had its moments. I am ever proud of Shannon for finally kicking Tamra and their toxic friendship to the curb, and I’m so glad that Gina and Shannon had each other’s backs throughout the discussion, while still also being super candid about their past friendship woes. But in case there were any questions about just how rich and just how privileged Heather Dubrow is, she helped us better understand last night.

As the group discusses paparazzi-gate and the season-long hoopla stirred over whether Heather did, in fact, call the paparazzi on herself to have photos taken of her and her husband at Disney to help combat rumours their marriage was in trouble, things got heated. As we know, this was a rumour Katie believed after receiving confirmation about it from a friend.

At one point, Heather slams Katie, saying that things with her don’t add up and that she has ‘absolutely no credibility’. After Katie’s apology, Heather delivers the following blow, saying:

“By the way, falsely accusing people is kind of your thing.”

As the rest of the group begins to ask questions about what she was implying, Emily explains that Katie once falsely accused someone and he ended up going to prison, a part of the story Katie denies.

As Katie explains it, she and her kids were driving in Georgia about 10 years ago and experienced a road rage incident with a man who swerved into their lane and yelled obscenities. She says she pulled over and called the police who instructed her to leave and says the man began filming her children inside the car. When the police arrived on scene, she says he was so belligerent that the police tased and arrested him and that was the reason he went to jail.

Heather, though, as many rich, privileged white people do, believes the police, who instead suggest that Katie followed the man home, Katie was texting in the car and the man became irate because he lost a family member to texting and driving. Katie followed him home, he began filming her, and when the police came, they arrested him and released him later on after determining Katie was the aggressor.

For me, this story isn’t about determining who is right and who is wrong in the road rage incident. For me, it’s about examining what we learn about societal structures through a reality TV lens – and what this lens is showing me is that Heather doesn’t believe that the police are capable of lying – particularly in their dealings with a person of colour, the only person of colour in this franchise.

The ease, comfort and accusation in Heather’s tone in which she said, “So the police are lying?” indicates to me that Heather has the privilege of believing that the police are inherently good. It indicates to me that she has never had the fear that many people of colour have in merely seeing someone in a uniform. It indicates to me that Heather is so protected by her whiteness, wealth and affiliation that there is no doubt in her mind that to protect and serve is the only agenda of law enforcement officers. 

Coming off of a week of heightened political tension, and coming off a few years where racial tension, race-based violence, and particularly anti-Asian racism has been so prominent, this was an absolute disappointment. Though I am so proud of Katie for standing her ground in this group of rich, white women (except maybe Jennifer Pedranti, sorry girl), I have grown very skeptical of Heather’s philanthropy given how her beliefs have been shaped by her privilege. 

Pressure mounts for Pavit and Jessel

Since the first season of Real Housewives of New York, we’ve watched Pavit and Jessel navigate the impossible crossroad of whether to have another baby, as that famous and frequently discussed “biological clock” ticks on. While Jessel is thrilled by the mere idea of having a little girl, her husband’s constant response of “We’ll see” is clearly driving her nuts.

This week, Jessel hangs out with her mom at a nail salon. And in true, mom and grandmother fashion, she’s enthralled at the idea of another baby being in the family, particularly a girl, but leaves the decision to the couple. Jessel also attends a lunch with an IVF coach (which she attended alone, but we’ll get back to that in a minute).

“I think that the decision to have a baby is not just one’s person decision,” Jessel says to Pavit from across the table during date night, where the two are discussing, yet again, a possible third child. 

I don’t think it’s fair of me to even suggest that the two of them are having a conversation. Because most of their conversations about this very topic is Jessel talking, Pavit kind of listening, the conversation leading absolutely nowhere, and a pin is put in it until the next time it comes up. It’s very rinse and repeat.

“The decision’s already made,” Pavit responds. “There is no baby.”

So much for the whole “not just one person’s decision” thing Jessel just mentioned. She goes on to say that it would be a big mistake, to which Pavit responds by complimenting the noodles, adding hot honey to his plate, and whipping his phone out to take more photos for his Instagram account which, as I mentioned before, is quite impressive.

Jessel is completely frustrated and suggests seeing a professional to help the pair navigate the decision, saying she feels like an outside person can “help him understand his emotions” and assist them in their communication. But when Pavit finds out the appointment would run anywhere between $300-$500 he suggests he’ll find someone they can go to, aka, it likely won’t happen.

I feel bad for Jessel. But I also feel bad for Pavit. And there’s a huge part of me that wants to know what was discussed before tying the knot. Unfortunately, this is a very real situation that tons of couples go through. When one person wants a child, or another child, it completely shifts every single function of the family from the finances to the couple’s sex life to the vehicle you drive. 

I’ve always felt like something was off about their marriage. And though this season they seem to be faring a lot better than they were last year, it’s becoming clear that this is what is off about them. The tension from this situation is evidently bleeding into almost every other aspect of their lives and if they don’t get a professional’s help, things will only worsen.

‘Real Housewives of Dubai’ put on pause two seasons in

After weeks of rumours, news outlets confirmed that we won’t be seeing the ladies from Dubai anytime soon. It’s the latest casualty in a slew of Bravo shows being put on pause, whatever that means.

Okay, we know what it means. It’s the in-between place of a show not quite being cancelled but not quite being renewed. We saw this with Vanderpump Rules, Summer House: Martha’s Vineyard and Winter House. And while Vanderpump Rules is apparently back in production mode, the same can’t be said for the other two. 

Personally, I enjoyed Real Housewives of Dubai. I appreciated the storylines and I really appreciated the cultural diversity of the cast. But part of me wonders if the fate of Real Housewives of Dubai lies in the hands of the newly announced Real Housewives of London, set to premiere next year.

The thing about Real Housewives of London, though, is that Bravo…kinda tried it already. From 2013-2017, Ladies of London aired and it was pretty much like a Real Housewives series. And oddly enough, Caroline Stanbury, who appeared in the last two seasons of Real Housewives of Dubai was introduced to us as a star in Ladies of London.

With all that considered, she must be pissed then. I mean, if she moved to Dubai, snagged a role on the show, only for it to be put on pause while the show she originally got her start on in the city she left picked back up? I’d definitely be breaking things.

I can’t even pretend I’m not excited. We haven’t had a new franchise since we were introduced to the cast of Salt Lake City. And look how much has happened over there since the series premiere. We just have to hope that the London housewives are rich and chaotic. Very rich. Very chaotic.