Assy Style Worst Actress: Jane Lynch Look, I’ve looked through it over and over again, to choose someone else, anyone else, for such a dubious distinction. But last night, it kept coming back to this. To Jane Lynch. Beloved Jane Lynch. Because even though we adore her, even though she’s a badass bitch who’ By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 06:22 am
Quiveration Best SAG Actor...even with a slight hair problem Admit it, there was too much height happening with his hair. Admit it. Just a little. Just a little overlifting. It wasn’t bad from every angle, but from some angles, it wasn’t great either. It wasn’t however as distracting as his tiny bow tie from the Golden By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 05:17 am
Douchebags SAG Boss: Mark Wahlberg There’s been no mention yet of James Franco I WENT TO FILM SCHOOL. Why? Because his ego penis was nowhere near as intrusive as Mark Wahlberg’s last night. Wahlberg dragged his balls on stage and cockily took up our time to stroke his own dick. Did you see? By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 04:42 am
Assy Style SAG let this be the last time: Angie Harmon Are you done with this dress and all its interpretations? Penelope Cruz did it one year at the Oscars, and repeated herself a few times after that, and every other designer decided to copy that big full feather/bubble/cotton ball skirt… to the point that now, without fail, it By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 04:25 am
Style Best SAG Print: Claire Danes And a monumental bitchface too when she got out of her car. I attributed it to hunger. Angela just looks so hungry all the time, so bulimic in the jaw, gossip would be a lot less interesting if these people decided to eat like normal. Boys too, not just girls. By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 04:18 am
Girlcrushes Best SAG Surprise Colour: Tina Fey Tina Fey not in black! Tina Fey not in navy! Tina Fey not in grey! Tina Fey in RED! So good, right? Unless invited to present at the Oscars, the SAGs are the end of the awards show road for those who work primarily in television. Tina decided to go By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 04:03 am
Assy Style SAG Possessed Bride: Winona Ryder Why is my girl so crazy? Half the time she looks, like, stunned to be there. And it’s not like Winona Ryder is a stranger to these occasions. Quite the opposite, in fact. Winona should be very familiar with an awards season. But it’s still like a caged By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 03:48 am
Girlcrushes Best SAG Body: Sofia Vergara I’m actually not sure how a body like hers is mathematically possible. Between the size of her breasts and the smallness of her waist, it’s a goddamn mindf-ck. No complaint here. Especially not when she starts talking. I can’t find the video online yet. But she was, By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 03:27 am
Style SAG Old Navy: Hailee Steinfeld I thought she was 16. She’s not 16. Not even close. She’s 14. As in she JUST TURNED 14 a month ago. Like she still has an entire year of being 14 ahead of her. Good for her for finding a dress that actually looks like she has By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 03:11 am
Amazingness SAG Determined: Paz de la Huerta If you’re not familiar with my Paz de la Huerta obsession, you must have missed this article from December. Or maybe you don’t watch Boardwalk Empire? She’s made moaning an art on Boardwalk Empire. And she practically moaned up on stage last night during Boardwalk Empire’s By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 02:59 am
Style SAG Hernia: Lea Michele I’ve had hernias on the mind for days, when Charlie Sheen apparently busted one last week after an allnighter with a briefcase full of cocaine. Last night, while Lea Michele was over-working it on the carpet, I thought she was going to bust one too. The concentration on her By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 02:38 am
Assy Style SAG Just Miss: Jennifer Lawrence What an eyesore. And I don’t just mean the colour. It’s the colour and the details. The black details. That black belt. And those black shoes, made clunkier by contrast… it was all a little amateur. Which, frankly, I find rather endearing. She is the middle class girl By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 02:16 am
Amazingness SAG Jinx: Justin Timberlake Click here for a refresher on what I wrote last week. When JT doesn’t show up, The Social Network cleans up. When he does show up, like at the Producers Guild, TSN gets no love. Justin attended the SAGs last night. Guess what happened? The Social Network was trumped By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 02:07 am
Hook Ups SAG Black Swans: Natalie Portman & Mila Kunis Natalie Portman did nothing annoying last night. Ok maybe her clapping. But even I can concede that that’s really, really stretching. She looked lovely, her womb did not inform her acceptance speech, and I have to say I quite enjoyed the attitude she was throwing at Giuliana Rancic during By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 01:47 am
Assy Style Worst SAG Headband: Kate Mara Also known as the sister of Lisbeth Salander, Rooney Mara. Kate is dating Max Minghella who starred with Rooney in The Social Network. They also, Kate and Max, worked together on an upcoming film called Ten Year. Kate is so periphery I normally wouldn’t include her in this kind By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 01:32 am
Hook Ups Worst SAG Breasts: Naya Rivera One of the Glee nominated clips they used during the telecast was Jane Lynch’s Sue Sylvester telling Naya Rivera’s Santana that she wasn’t down with “plastics”. Too bad they didn’t cut to Naya’s face right after. It’s particularly egregious on someone so young and By Lainey • Jan 31, 2011 01:20 am
