Katie Holmes As if on cue… It was noted yesterday that Tom Cruise had gone underground despite the surprising opening numbers for Valkyrie. He must have heard our call because he emerged yesterday, bright eyed and big toothed, smiling for the cameras after bowling with Connor and while escorting KatE to work. Tom Cruise currently has By Lainey • Dec 31, 2008 02:28 am
Chills Chills Chills Best of 2008: Xenu the video I almost forgot! I almost forgot about the video that made our lives! The theme from Mission Impossible, Tom’s crazy cackle, Tom’s crazy serious face immediately following his crazy cackle, the Xenu gibberish spewing from his mouth, and then his acceptance of that award swearing allegiance to LRH… By Lainey • Dec 17, 2008 02:40 am
Famewhores Glibness and forgiveness Tom Cruise’s tour of contrition continues. And … it’s working. Because while Valkyrie will likely still suck sh-t at the box office, Hollywood players have been very impressed with his efforts on this promotional tour, resurrecting the Tom Cruise of the 90s, willing the MiniVan to remember him By Lainey • Dec 15, 2008 04:51 am
Chills Chills Chills They bought it Tom’s tour of Toronto – a resounding success. But first the new cover of People Magazine: MiniVan friendly, good hair, that famous smile, a glimpse of Little Sci, and the tantalising prospect of seeing Tom’s personal family photos. Please. It’s brilliant. They will eat this sh-t up. By Lainey • Dec 10, 2008 02:43 am
Frauds Tom in Toronto Tom Cruise is in Toronto right now – media blitz for the embattled Valkyrie which, am told, is not a bad movie, and a very interesting story, but for Tom’s involvement and he’s completely overshadowed and out-acted by Kenneth Branagh, Tom Wilkinson, and Bill Nighy. Valkyrie’s success By Lainey • Dec 08, 2008 10:31 am
Chills Chills Chills KatE in control? So Tom Cruise and Robo appear on the cover of T: the NY Times Style Magazine due out on Sunday. Each girl gets her own cover, each was interviewed separately, each gushed sugar rape Rossum styles about their love. But first… Katie Holmes insists she can think for herself: " By Lainey • Dec 04, 2008 09:59 am
Bad Style His Pants! There is nothing wrong with your eyes. That is indeed Tom Cruise. And his pants… his pants are hanging ever so slightly better. Slightly. An infinitesimal amount. But an infinitesimal improvement nonetheless. How did this happen? Well, he looks like he’s lost weight. Probably working out super hard to By Lainey • Dec 04, 2008 08:00 am
Famewhores Holiday white wedgies! Tom Cruise and Little Sci were sighted yesterday in New York…and so were his white wedge sneakers – for extra, extra lift! How many pairs did he custom order? They’re always so new and fresh. You think he has a cobbler on permanent payroll? Someone who knows how to By Lainey • Dec 04, 2008 02:34 am
Famewhores Sunday Rose: just like Little Sci Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise were together a long time. You learn a lot over a decade. You learn about contracts and marriage, you learn about fraud, you learn about famewhoring, you learn what to do when your back is up against a wall, when your career is in jeopardy, By Lainey • Dec 02, 2008 02:17 am
Famewhores Two families at the circus Or creating one. The Cruises and the Beckhams, in New York together, headed out en masse yesterday for a performance of the Big Apple Circus. The moms KatE and Victoria also went on a carriage ride. It was a busy, active day. So of course Posh strutted around in tight By Lainey • Nov 28, 2008 02:18 am
Famewhores A Cruise Beckham Thanksgiving They all gathered for dinner last night in New York after Katie’s performance on Broadway – a double family Thanksgiving feast. Italian. Which means Victoria had one piece of penne and 3 slices of plain grilled zucchini, hold the olive oil. Both the Beckhams and the Cruises brought all three By Lainey • Nov 27, 2008 02:04 am
Famewhores Breaking! They`re still friends! The Beckhams are in New York and they were photographed this afternoon leaving with Tom apparently en route to see Katie perform. So they’re still friends after all. And Tom Cruise is promoting Valkyrie. So he’s calling in the favours, lining them up one by one. First the By Lainey • Nov 26, 2008 06:59 am
Famewhores Kate, Kate, Kate and Tom watches football It is a new world. A world Tom is not altogether familiar with. These days, the number one movie at the box office is sold at the mall. Many malls across America. These days you have to hustle. Tom Cruise hasn’t had to hustle in a very long time. By Lainey • Nov 25, 2008 11:46 am
Famewhores Robo and Little Sci wear dresses Out and about in New York today. Little Sci’s little dress is, as always, the cutest. But her mother… I don’t know what that is. Like, plaid might be all the rage but in this form? But plaid in prairie styles? With boots in the winter and not By Lainey • Nov 24, 2008 12:27 pm
Girly Throw Downs Marky Mark hates Xenu This is Mark Wahlberg with his long suffering but ultimately rewarded baby mother today at a medical centre either on his way to play golf or just coming back from. Max Payne, Mark’s most recent film last month came and went at the box office, no doubt a major By Lainey • Nov 18, 2008 01:53 pm
Frauds Robo evolved? Tom Cruise and his RoboBride celebrate 2 years of wedded bliss today. Two years ago the entire world was invited to Rome. And David Miscavige was Tom’s maid of honour. And Katie Holmes’s imprisonment continues. However despite the rumours and the bullsh-t headlines concocted by Life & By Lainey • Nov 18, 2008 01:02 pm
