While Travis Kelce is prepping for the divisional round against the Buffalo Bills this Sunday, Taylor Swift is back at the Electric Lady Studio in New York.
I am not enough of a Swiftie to know if she’s recording new music or working on her penultimate re-recorded album. I do know she puts on a little fashion show every time she steps outside, and yesterday’s fit was a spiffed-up version of Nineties grunge, complete with chunky boots. Super into it, even though I am not an outfit girl. I admire the outfit girls, who have the energy to coordinate every inch of a look, but even as a kid I was too tired for that. Like, I loved Cher Horowitz, but I knew I could never be Cher Horowitz. Taylor Swift gives me the same vibes. I love her outfits, but it could never be me.
Yesterday, Lainey called Dua Lipa and Callum Turner the “B-plot” to TNT. I can’t with this. The B-plot to TNT is Jason and Kylie Kelce’s family comedy, like the Vacation-esque spin-off of TNT. Dua and Callum—the suggested couple portmanteau on The Squawk was “Turnipa”, a turn off unto itself—are, at best, the C-plot. Or, really, they’re the contrast couple you see in the background of a pivotal scene. Like when the heroine is sad about the breakup in act three, she’ll see a happy couple holding hands in the park. Or when the hero is talking to his guy friends while playing basketball or racquetball about how he’s so in love with this girl, there will be a couple arguing in their vicinity, a foreshadowing of the difficulty to come.
Dua and Callum are this couple. Their newfound love comes as TNT has become normalized in the culture, and as we’re facing the drama and upheavals of the NFL playoffs. By the rules of rom-com foreshadowing, if the contrast couple is happy, our hero couple is in for a rough ride. I hope not!
But while TNT have weathered some tough Chiefs losses to date, they haven’t been through a playoff loss yet. This is the episode of TNT I am most interested in. If Travis keeps winning, well, then it’s the full fairytale, complete with like, proposing with his Super Bowl ring (I know they don’t get the rings right away, just go with the imagery, you can picture it, can’t you!). But if they lose? If HE loses, as competitive as he is, as dramatic as this season has been?
It’s one thing to be a cheerleader when the team is winning. It’s something else entirely to pick up the pieces after a season-ending loss, never mind having to do it in front of the world, and with, undoubtedly, some portion of sports media blaming you for it. Don’t think I haven’t noticed that the “Taylor is a curse” talk comes from OUTSIDE Kansas City. The KC fans have embraced Taylor, she is one of them now. But the sports media? Cannot keep her name out of their mouth and are clearly SALIVATING at the idea of a “blame Taylor” campaign. It’s so misogynistic, it would make me scream if I actually expected better from the sports media in the US. You know who the sports media are in the TNT rom-com? The dickhead ex-boyfriend that keeps popping up at the worst times.